Newest Faster Jokes - Worst Jokes Ever

What does Nike and the KKK have in common? They both make Black people run faster

French feminist Luce Irigaray calls "E=mc2" a "sexed equation." She claims
that it is sexist because "privileges the speed of light over other speeds that
are vitally necessary to us." Irigaray thinks its sexist for the formula to
"privilege that which goes faster."
Irigaray believes that all of physics is sexist. She sees a massive male
conspiracy in physics that has made fluid mechanics, which she associates
with the feminine, less developed than solid mechanics. She thinks male
physicists are deliberately not studying fluid mechanics because men's
bodies don't have a particular fluid in them: menstrual fluid.
I HAVE TRANSCENDED ABOVE AND
BEYOND
THE EMOTION OF ANGER

Me explaining that a
pregnant horse can run faster
cause it has two horsepower
My physics teacher

shwepid
red what were you doing this round??
shwepid
red sus they taking too much time to reply
Enola
still faster than your crush's reply
shwepid
vote red

Are you a lollipop? Because I can suck on you all day. Are you an Oreo? Because I eat the cream first. Are you a microwave? Because I’m trying to keep you quiet at 3:00 am. Are you a sprinkler? Cause every time I see you I get wet. Are you makeup? Cause I’d spend hours doing you. Are you a guitar? Because I’d love to hear the noises you make when I play with you. Are you an elevator? Cause I wanna ride you up and down. Most restaurants are closed at night.. but your legs aren’t. I’m not a cashier, but you got a couple of things I wanna check out. Are you Cinderella? Because I can see that dress coming off at midnight. Are you a calendar? Because I want to pin you against the wall. I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately... but I hope it’s you. Are you a doughnut? Cause I wanna fill you with cream. Are you a garden? Cause I want to plant some seeds inside of you. Do you sing in the shower? Because if so I need a private ticket of your concert. Are your legs the twin towers? Because I’ll bomb what’s in between. Are you a blanket? Because your on top of me every night. Are you a phone? Cause I like to be on you 24/7. Are you a roller coaster? Because the faster you go, the louder I scream. I’m so jealous of your heart right now because it’s pounding inside of you and I’m not. Are you a popsicle? Cause all I want to do is lick you up and down. Are you a construction worker? Because you got me all bricked up. Are you a fireman? Because you came in hot and left me wet.

Your hairline is running away faster than when your dad went to get milk and that’s saying something

Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch cold.

Fuck you

5:40 black looks clean af
Probably runs faster too
(C.
O
78

which falls faster an apple or an emo kid.

the apple because the emo kid is hanging

So I painted my laptop black, hoping it would run faster... Now it doesn't work

Why can't gays drive faster than 68 mph?

Because at 69 they blow a rod

So the other day my black friend work are group project he was so slow so I whipped him to make him faster

Ps5 in black looks clean af

“Remember switching to your pistol is always faster than reloading.” - Sun Tzu, The Art of War

Your hairline went back faster than your adoption papers

why is the leaning tower of pizza leaning....... cuz it has faster reflexes then the twin towers

My friend: you ever feel like life is pointless *drives faster* Me: yea- My friend: if you could die with one person who would it be? *speeds up more* Me: H-hey you should slow down! slow down slow down! were about to-

So there’s this air purifier in my room right, and it’s really noisy so I unplugged it to sleep better and sure enough I fell asleep faster, so I came to the conclusion if I unplug noisy machines people will sleep better. It worked really well in my local hospital