Family jokes
I asked my mom what her biggest regret was for a project at school, and she said, "Oh, go look in the bathroom above the sink..." There was a mirror.
What do you call an orphan's family region?
Me time.
Mom: Let's have an adoption party!
Kid: *cries*
Mom: What's wrong?
Kid: I'M ADOPTED????
Why don't orphans play baseball?
They don't have a home to run back to.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
What’s the difference between candy and an orphan?
Candy is something everybody wants.
A joker gives Batman a coupon for new parents. It's expired.
Teacher: Is anyone's parents missing?
Students: Yeah, yours.
What do a Family Dollar and an orphan have in common? They both have a "f" in "family."
Why do orphans play with other kids on a playground?
So they will sneak into their parents' car to be a brother or sister.
How come orphans know how to do laundry?
Cause that's usually the mom's job.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What does the M and D in "orphan" stand for?
"Mum" and "Dad."
Why can an orphan not have homework? They do not have a home.
Have you watched the show "Naked and Afraid"? Well, I play it every Saturday with my uncle.
I've been looking for my parents for years. For the life of me, I can't remember where I buried them.
Why do orphans go to the market?
To get the milk their parents didn't bring back.
When you ask an orphan to come over:
Kid: "Do you want to come over to my house?"
Orphan: "Yeah, sure."
Kid: "Ok, ask your parents—oh wait."
I got a sister.
That was a big mistake.
Me: *watching TV*
Mom: Omg, no way, your dad is coming!
Me: Really?
Mom: Obviously not, he never loved or wanted you.