Family jokes

One day, an orphan threw a boomerang, and it didn’t come back like its parents.

April Fools' joke: Go to an orphanage and say your parents came back.

Why do orphans go to church?

So they have someone to call father.

The twin towers are like my parents, only one came back.

Johnny: Mommy, Mommy! What is incest?

Mom: Shut up and keep licking.

How do emos propose?

"Would you like to join my family tree?"

Maria went home happy, telling her mother about how she earned $20 by climbing a tree. Her mom responded, "Maria, they just wanted to see your panties!" Maria replied, "See Mom, I was smart, I took them off!"

What do you say after committing incest?

No Chromo!

You wanna know what I want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.

Son: Dad, why did you name my sister Paris?

Dad: Because she was made there.

Son: Thanks, Dad.

Dad: You're welcome, Backseat.

A doctor is telling three women what they are addicted to.

He says to the first one, "You are addicted to money, you named your daughter Penny."

He says to the second one, "You are addicted to food, you named your daughter Candy."

Then the third one whispers to her son, "Come on, Dick, let's go."

Yo mama so fat, when she bought a fur coat a whole species went extinct.

Rape jokes are like your dad's dick. You don't want it but you still get it anyway.

Do you want to know why they call it an orphanage? Because they couldn't call it orphans home.

"I'm not sure why my girlfriend's father doesn't like me."

"What was your first impression on him?"

"I told him, she calls me daddy too."

How do orphans have a family reunion? They look in the mirror.

I told my sister I was into incest. She took it really hard. 😉😏

I asked my mum why she’s depressed, she said her life has been a wreck. I asked how long has it been, she then asked when I was born.

Why don't orphans like to get lost?

Because somebody's going to ask where their parents are.

I was horrified when my wife told me that my six-year-old son wasn't actually mine. Apparently, I need to pay more attention during school pick-up.