Family jokes
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't go home.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.
Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.
Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.
Silence...................punch!
These are not funny. Those that are adopted feel hurt by these!
You shall feel ashamed of yourself!
Take the L! - Losers
My wife cheated on me with my brother.
She didn't have a sister, so I improvised, and now all I have to do is wait nine months for one to come.
My little sister that is 10 is so ugly her hairline can't even be found by Dora the Explorer.
Why can't an orphan win a baseball game?
Because they can't reach home.
If my mom decides to get Chick-fil-A for dinner, and when I decide to eat my family for dinner, is that called cannibalism?
Why do orphans miss Mother’s Day? Because they don’t have a mother to give to!
Sister, you're ugly.
Other sister: I'm not your reflection.
PS. Sorry if it is not funny.
When you realize your friend standing next to you is adopted and narrates everything he does.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You slept with my cousin but I did too.
Nobody likes you because you are an orphan.
What milk do orphan babies drink?
Not their mom's, though.
"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "You're." "You're who?" "You're parents left you."
The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening.
"Sure honey! If you suck my dick!"
So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!"
"Oh yeah, I forgot," says the father. "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."
I bet you eat your cereal with water because your dad never came back with the milk.
Your hairline is as nonexistent as your dad.
One time I was with my uncle. He said to me to pass him the marble on the floor. All I heard was my butt clapping with his sausage.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.
Nine months later, they happily had some use for their baby carriage.
Two years later, they went up again, then their daughter had a brother.
But one little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother.