Eating jokes
Don't say you want to eat out a five-year-old's pussy, because I have already shoved a glass dildo in her tight ass pussy, UwU.
I hate it when I accidentally eat out my dog, lol.
Why are fat people fat? Because they eat like Indians eating curry, except fat people eat many more portions.
What do you get if you eat sugar?
High.
Why do skeletons like having sex with short girls before eating?
They like to bone a petite.
What do cannibals call a wheelchair user?
"Uber Eats."
Isn't eating a clock time-consuming?
One morning, Peppy and George came downstairs for breakfast, but they got a plate of juicy bacon. Their dad had recently gone missing, so they ate it quite sadly.
The next morning, they went to school and asked their teacher, "What is bacon made out of?" The teacher replied, "Pigs, why?" Peppa and George looked horrified.
What is the difference between the National Organization For Carpet Munchers and the National Organization For Women?
The National Organization For Women has more experience in being a carpet muncher because they eat more pussy.
Yo momma so fat, she tried to eat a pie chart.
Nah, they eat emo meals.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair. 😎
How do goldfish know when to eat?
They don't. They have a memory span of 3 seconds.
Kenny is a comfort snacker.
Every time he's stressed, he eats his mom's pussy.
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?
Neither one of them, they eat out.
Stephen Hawking and his wife Siri’s favorite place to eat is Meals on Wheels!
I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.
Why can't fat kids play poker?
They eat all the chips.
What does a male Asian P*rnstar like to say?
"I love eating cat."
What do squats eat? Numbers.