Door jokes
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Aarghraawa."
There's an old lady doing gardening every year. Nothing grows. She goes to the man who lives next door. She says, "How do you get your tomatoes so big and red?" He tells her, "You show them your privates at night time." So she leaves. That night later, she goes outside and shows the garden her privates. The next day she's got zucchinis a meter long!
A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat. He is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with, "What do you mean? I already did it." Then the police ran back to the school to apprehend the other people he was planning it with. The cops busted in through the doors, which caused a smoke trap to go off, which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear, the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles, 4 per pole. Back at the station, holding the kid being apprehended, the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said, "Aww, it pays to be lazy!"
Why did 1 break the door open? Because 2, 3, 4.
Knock knock. "Who's there?" "Grandma." "Oh, okay."
Nah, it's a penis.
Why did Adam commit suicide? Andy went through the back door.
Wanna hear a clean one?
Old man takes a bath with bubbles.
Wanna hear a dirty one?
Bubbles is the 14 year old next door.
There's a sexy milf that lives next door. The only thing better is her 8 Y/O.
I knocked on Stephen Hawking's door, but nobody answered...
All I got was "error 404 page not found."
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Not Stephen Hawking."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in and I'll tell ya.
A man is at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. A few years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”
What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the idiot's door.
Knock, knock!
It's the chicken.
So Helen Keller walked into a bar, then a stool, then a table, then a door...
Knock, knock. Who's there? Iceberg lettuce. Iceberg lettuce who? Iceberg! Let us in!
What do you call a cute door?
Adoorable.
The exam is knocking at my door... so I ran away from the window.
I have a great job for you, but you have to start it off...
Knock, knock...
Who's there?
I don't know?!?
Did you hear about the person who invented the door knocker?
He won a no-bell prize.