Disease jokes
How do you execute Stephen Hawking?
The electric wheelchair.
I'm sorry your dad beat you instead of cancer.
James Bond gives all the ladies he's met the perfect birthday gift: Chlamydia.
What's breakdancing, twitching, and noisy?
A child with epilepsy.
What happens when you get a virus-related sickness? It goes viral on Twitter!
Memes
What’s the only positive thing about Freddie Mercury’s death?
The HIV test results.
What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection?
A quarter pounder with cheese.
Do you know how diarrhea is common in families? Because it runs in your genes.
Did you hear about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.
Why did Grampa pass out? Because of diabetes.
Why did Muhammad Ali go down? Because he couldn't stand the cancer.
What is the difference between a guy with cancer and the Twin Towers?
Nothing, they both fell.
Covid be like, "I'm going to take your breath away."
Your mom is SOO stupid, she was studying for a COVID test.
How did the tree get sick?
It got tinsel-itis.
Why was the leper hockey game canceled?
It was because of a face-off in the corner.
Quit making those progeria jokes. They get old very quickly.
Dark humor is like the plague; everyone was supposed to get it.
Imagine this scenario: A doctor walks in and tells the patient that he has all the illnesses, diseases, etc. in the world but cooler like this: "Bumbumbum you have depression, diarrhea, and cancer,... etc."
And then the last one on the list is that he is deaf, and then the doctor shows the patient the list.
What did the leper say to the prostitute?
Keep the tip.