Disease jokes
What kind of cold flu do the Japanese get? The Koflu.
He was in a fight, then a person said, "Stand up for yourself!"
I would've made a joke about Alzheimer's, too bad I forgot about it...
What's the most optimistic blood type? B+.
What disease causes wrinkled clothes? An iron deficiency.
The first rule of the Alzheimer’s club is...
Wait, where are we again?
Why do orphans die so much?
'Cause MJ said "she got COVID-19."
How do you execute Stephen Hawking?
The electric wheelchair.
Last year, I got kicked out of the Hospital for telling COVID patients to stay positive!
What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese.
James Bond gives all the ladies he's met the perfect birthday gift: Chlamydia.
What happens when you get a virus-related sickness? It goes viral on Twitter!
What's breakdancing, twitching, and noisy?
A child with epilepsy.
What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection?
A quarter pounder with cheese.
If you think I would joke about Alzheimer's, forget it.
Do you know how diarrhea is common in families? Because it runs in your genes.
Why was the leper hockey game canceled?
It was because of a face-off in the corner.
Did you hear about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.
Covid be like, "I'm going to take your breath away."
Your mom is SOO stupid, she was studying for a COVID test.
How did the tree get sick?
It got tinsel-itis.