My stepdad has stage 4 cancer and is going through chemotherapy... at least he saves money on shampoo and conditioner.
Did you hear the joke about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.
If certain diseases spread in water, why does Africa have them?
What do you call a person with cancer?
A ghost with a body.
What do you call an epileptic midget that works at Little Caesars?
Little Seizures.
What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
Answer: cancer.
Have you ever heard about the new virus in China? It's called Hupun.
Hupun DEEZ NUTS!
I cannot believe no one's come up with a cure for anorexia yet. I thought it would be a piece of cake!
I have it.
When you ask your friend if he thinks lunch is good, but he says that he doesn't taste anything.
What’s positive in Africa?
HIV/AIDS.
How do you make the world’s greatest Harlem Shake?
Throw a flashbang into a room full of epileptics.
Ads for meds be like: Chloroform its Chloroform helps with itchy eyes :side affects may include Acute Flaccid Myelitis (AFM) AIDS (HIV/AIDS) Alphaviruses. Alzheimer's Disease. Alzheimer's Diseases (Spanish) Arboviral Encephalitis. Arthritis. Babesiois.Cancer Unintentional injuries Chronic lower respiratory disease. ... Stroke and cerebrovascular diseases. ... Alzheimer's disease. ... Diabetes. ... Influenza and pneumonia.
A girl goes to a Church to confess.
Girl: "Forgive me father for I have sinned."
Priest: "What have you done my child?"
Girl: "I called a man a son of a bitch."
Priest: "Why did you call him a son of a bitch?"
Girl: "Because he touched my hand."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he touches her hand)
Girl: "Yes father."
Priest: "That's no reason to call a man a son of a bitch."
Girl: "Then he touched my breast."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he touched her breast)
Girl: "Yes father."
Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."
Girl: "Then he took off my clothes, father."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he takes off her clothes)
Girl: "Yes father."
Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."
Girl: "Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he stuck his you know what into her you know where)
Girl: "YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!"
(after a few minutes)
Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."
Girl: "But father, he had AIDS!"
Priest: "THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!"
What STD can you get from phone sex?
Hearing AIDS.
What did the blind deaf orphan child get for Christmas?
cancer
My girlfriend got COVID.
This is the perfect time to propose to her. She might just say yes because of the lack of taste.
What's the natural cure to an old man's inability to forgive people?
Alzheimer's.
What do you call two Hispanics with Parkinson's disease? Maracas.
What type of comedy can't Steven Hawking do?
Stand-up comedy.
