Disease jokes
Why can’t Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat.
If you don’t get it, a Chinese woman ate a bat and she got the coronavirus (I think).
I'm not saying you're annoying. But if rectal herpes were a person, it would be you.
If you think I would joke about Alzheimer's, forget it.
What kind of cold flu do the Japanese get? The Koflu.
Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?
We send millions of mosquito nets to Africa; we can save millions of mosquitoes from dying of AIDS.
Chuck Norris has come in contact with Covid.
Covid is now in a 14-day quarantine.
What's the most optimistic blood type? B+.
What disease causes wrinkled clothes? An iron deficiency.
Scientists are trying to find a cure for anorexics. It should be a piece of cake!
He was in a fight, then a person said, "Stand up for yourself!"
What's breakdancing, twitching, and noisy?
A child with epilepsy.
What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese.
Last year, I got kicked out of the Hospital for telling COVID patients to stay positive!
A guy does not know anything. Oh, wait, he has dementia.
Why do orphans die so much?
'Cause MJ said "she got COVID-19."
How do you execute Stephen Hawking?
The electric wheelchair.
James Bond gives all the ladies he's met the perfect birthday gift: Chlamydia.
What happens when you get a virus-related sickness? It goes viral on Twitter!
Do you know how diarrhea is common in families? Because it runs in your genes.
Why was the leper hockey game canceled?
It was because of a face-off in the corner.