Disease jokes
Chuck Norris has come in contact with Covid.
Covid is now in a 14-day quarantine.
How do you execute Stephen Hawking?
The electric wheelchair.
Why do orphans die so much?
'Cause MJ said "she got COVID-19."
James Bond gives all the ladies he's met the perfect birthday gift: Chlamydia.
What happens when you get a virus-related sickness? It goes viral on Twitter!
What's breakdancing, twitching, and noisy?
A child with epilepsy.
I'm not saying you're annoying. But if rectal herpes were a person, it would be you.
If you think I would joke about Alzheimer's, forget it.
What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection?
A quarter pounder with cheese.
Why can’t Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat.
If you don’t get it, a Chinese woman ate a bat and she got the coronavirus (I think).
Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?
We send millions of mosquito nets to Africa; we can save millions of mosquitoes from dying of AIDS.
What kind of cold flu do the Japanese get? The Koflu.
What’s the only positive thing about Freddie Mercury’s death?
The HIV test results.
What's a cancer patient's favorite food?
Kentucky Fried Chemotherapy
Do you know how diarrhea is common in families? Because it runs in your genes.
Covid be like, "I'm going to take your breath away."
What is the difference between a guy with cancer and the Twin Towers?
Nothing, they both fell.
Your mom is SOO stupid, she was studying for a COVID test.
You know who else suffers from Alzheimer's...
You know who else suffers from Alzheimer's.