Didnt jokes
Kid 1: Guys, stop making 9/11 jokes. My dad died in 9/11.
Kid 2: Sorry, I didn't know.
Kid 1: He was the best fighter pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
Did you hear about the baseball game between America and Ethiopia?
America - 8
Ethiopia - didn't.
A 10 year old girl meets with her doctor. The doctor tells her “Katie, I’m sorry to have to tell you that your parents didn’t survive the accident. Sadly, our tests also show that you have early onset Alzheimer’s disease.”
Katie replies “well at least my parents will look after me.”
A man shot into a crowd at the train station and didn't hit one person. When the police asked why he missed, someone said, "'Cause he gay."
He couldn't shoot straight.
Why did the teacher yell at the orphan?
Because he didn’t do his homework.
Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn’t have any arms.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Not Susie.
Why is the Pentagon mad?
Because it didn't get two pizzas, but only one plane pizza.
What is the difference between the subway guy and a priest?
The subway guy didn’t get away with it...
I didn't come into the prostitution business...
It came into me.
A woman went into her garden and danced in front of her vegetables.
The next morning, her corn didn’t grow, and the tomatoes didn’t blush or turn red, but the cucumbers grew four inches.
I told a 9/11 joke to my friends today.
It didn't land well.
An orphan girl's boyfriend broke up with her, what was his reason?
"If her parents didn't want her, why should I?"
A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.
When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"
God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."
Why did Stephen die so early?
He didn't use long lasting batteries.
Why can't orphans have cereal? Because their dad didn't come back with the milk.
Why are orphans running around the world after the baseball coach said, "Go home"?
Because he didn’t know what the hell to do.
Yo mama is so short, Minions look down at her.
Yo mama is so fat that she volunteered for the Hunger Games 'cause she thought it was an eating competition.
Yo mama is so ugly when Santa Claus saw her, he yelled "Ho Ho Holy Sh*t!"
Yo mama is so old, when she walked into an antique store, they didn't let her leave.
Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.
Anyone want a free pizza? Because you liking a pizza with toppings that not many people enjoy allows you to eat the entire guilt free pizza, that they said they didn't want and everyone already offered you a slice of.
The extra detention didn't do much, but the extra chromosome definitely did.
When we told Twin Towers to put on airplane mode, we didn't mean a real airplane.