Dick's jokes
Nick sucks dick.
Your dick is as flat as your grandma's heart rate.
I knew a girl called Melissa, but she was a tranny, and he could suck his own dick.
How do you have sex? You take off your clothes and shove your dick in the girl's pussy. If girl suck his dick.
"Dick dick dick, fuck dick nugget shit."
Seriously, who wants dicks?
What did the naked man say to the naked woman?
"Suck my dick."
Little Johnny wanted a lolly, so his dada gave him dick.
Your momma's so nasty, she sucked your daddy's dick and kissed you good night!
My girl walks in the room in nude mode and sat on my dick. I said, "What up, your pussy?" She said, "Your dick."
A girl said, "Suck my dick," and the man went, "I have boobs."
An alien walks into a bar. There is a guy sitting next to him, and the alien touches his shoulder.
The man says, "Do that one more time and I'll run you over." The alien does it again and gets ran over. They get back in the bar and he touches him again. The man says, "Do that again and I'll chop your dick off." He touches him again. The man pulls the alien's pants down and pulls out his knife. He was astonished at what he found. There was nothing there! He looks up at the alien and looks at his finger and fainted.
If you go to the military and you get sent to a country, how many heads will you blow off?
That number is how many dicks you suck.
These are some of the greatest names ever: Dixie Normous, Dixie Rekt, Ka Monmi, Ice Wallow Kum, Dick Sinsider, Anita Biggerman.
My dick is like the way home for an orphan, its length is never-ending.
When she says she wrestles, so you pull out your dick and she punches it.
A friend of mine chews gum, lays back to yawn, then chokes on the gum. Then I said, "God, what, you choking on dick?"
What do you call my dick?
A. A monster.
China servers are up on Fortnite, yeah, check by there.
"China getting this dick in your mouth 😂"
America: Saying, "I beg your pardon" in British English is like saying; "What did you say to me you orphaned big forehead shitty ass small dick bitch?"
UK: You Americans are so fucking rude.
America: Oh, I'm SoRrY mIsTeR fAnCy PaNts 👖