daddy's jokes
Why is an orphan gay? Because they can call somebody "daddy."
A young boy walked up to his dad and asked, "Daddy, why are you banned from coming to elementary school?"
The dad calmly replies, "Because that's how I met your mother."
Why do most orphans become prostitutes?...
'Cause they need to find someone to call DADDY.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy".
Why do orphans have sex?
To call someone "daddy"!
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy."
Father: "That's great, son. Who is she?"
Son: "It's Tina, the neighbor's daughter."
Father: "Ohhh, I wish you hadn't said that. I have to tell you something, son, but you must promise not to tell your mother. Tina is actually your sister."
The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later:
Son: "Daddy, I fell in love again, and she is even hotter!"
Father: "That's great, son. Who is she?"
Son: "It's Peny, the other neighbor's daughter."
Father: "Ohhhh, I wish you hadn't said that. Peny is also your sister."
This went on a couple of times, and the son was so mad, he went straight to his mother crying.
Son: "Mum, I am so mad at Dad! I fell in love with six girls, but I can't date any of them because Daddy is their father!"
The mother hugs him affectionately and says:
"My love, you can date whoever you want. Don't listen to him. He is not your father!"
Why did most orphans become prostitutes?
Because they wanted a daddy.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call daddy.
Why am I banned from my Catholic orphanage?
Because the children kept calling me "daddy."
Do you know why Daddy never comes back to get the milk? Because he’s the milkman.
Orphan: My mommy and daddy love me.
Guy: Where are they then?
Orphan: In the eternal depths of [hell].
Why can't orphans have sex?
They do not have anyone to call "daddy."
Little Johnny and little Sally walked in on Mommy and Daddy going at it in the bedroom doggy style. They innocently ask, "Mommy, Daddy what are you doing?"
Mommy says, "Oh, Daddy is just parking his car in Mommy's garage, now go and play."
A few minutes later they hear a blood curdling squeal and run to see what was the matter.
Little Johnny is running in circles squealing and little Sally says, "Well little Johnny was trying to park his car in my garage and he couldn't get the back wheels in so I took the scissors and cut them off."
Little Johnny walked into the bathroom while his dad was taking a dump. As soon as Little Johnny walked in, his dad let out a big FART! Little Johnny said, “WHAT WAS THAT?” His dad said, “That was the sound of the north wind.” The next day his teacher asked the class, “What’s the direction of the north wind?” Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher called on him and he said, “TEACH IT’S MY DADDY’S BOOTY!”
Why can’t orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy".
What is an orphan's least favorite movie?
"Daddy's Home."
Kid to daddy: "Why do they call it Uranus?"
Daddy to kid: "Cause, son, it's Uranus."
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because there is nobody to call "daddy."