Crawl jokes
Jack quietly crawled through Jill’s bedroom window, trying not to make a single noise. She sat on her bed, her back facing him. Jack tiptoed up behind her, laid his hands on her shoulders and said, in a rather sensual tone,
“Boo.”
“Jack!” She yelled, “what are you doing here?”
Jack sat down next to her and smiled.
“I figured today was a good day to maybe go up to the hill?” He said.
“That sounds fun,” said Jill.
“C’mon, let’s go!”
The kids climbed down from Jill’s second story window. They frolicked around in the fields, hair swaying in the wind, as they neared the nearby hill. Jack took Jill’s hand, and they skipped up to the very top of the hill. They sat down on the bright green grass and giggled.
“You ready?” Asked Jack.
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” Jill replied with a wink.
Jack laid his hand on Jill’s chest, softly pushing her onto her back. He got down on his knees, and bent down to the bottom of her dress.
“I’ve waited a long time for this...” he whispered.
Jack slowly pulled up Jill’s dress with one hand, running the other up her thigh. His anticipation was building faster and faster. He looked her in the eyes as he slowly pulled down her panties. Once they were all the way off, he turned his head downward. His mouth opened, his eyes went wide. Jack was speechless. Before he could say anything, Jill slammed his head down, gagging him with her giant cock. She sat up as she slammed his head up and down. Jack began to feel dizzy as he gagged and coughed.
“Silly Jack, didn’t you know? I’m not Jill. I never was. My name’s Randy. You’re mine now, Jack. So sit back, enjoy the ride.” Said Randy.
Randy moved Jack’s head faster and faster as he threw his head back. It was coming, fast. All of a sudden, he stopped. Jack’s head stood still as his mouth became a fountain of white, drizzling all over Randy’s legs and onto the grass. Randy let go and Jack jumped back, spitting and trying to get it all out of his mouth. Just as the dizziness began to fade, Randy walked over. The last thing Jack saw was Randy’s fist hurtling towards him...
My boyfriend dumped me. Guess who came back crawling for his zimmer frame?
My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair and guess who came crawling back!
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back!
A friend of mine told me this joke a long time ago and I have never forgotten it.
A worm was crawling over a train track, and a train ran over him and cut off his ass. The worm turned around to get the piece of his ass back and another train ran over him and cut off his head.
BAD IDEA and a lesson to us all.
NEVER LOSE YOUR HEAD OVER A PIECE OF ASS!! LMAO (literally, kind of)( pretty sure you get it)
What happens to a baby when you let it run loose? It can't cause it can't run yet.
Me and my girlfriend broke up, so I took her wheelchair, and she came crawling back.
Why do you have to wipe yourself with toilet paper? Because bugs can crawl, eat your poop, and drink your pee!
Me: My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday, and I had her wheelchair.
Me: Guess who came crawling right back?
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It don't matter what you call it, 'cause it ain't gonna come to you.
I may not be that good with puns on this site, but I got a skele-ton of jokes. Hey, what's the matter pal, is there something crawling under your skin?
Trump's cabinet are like panties. Some crawl up your butt, some snap under pressure, and some actually cover your butt when you need them.
My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”
I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”
I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”
What do you do after your girlfriend with two broken legs dumps you?
Take her wheelchair, she'll come crawling back.
Walking's a chore, let alone crawling.
My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.
But I knew she’d come crawling back to me.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Because he doesn’t know where home is.
How do you stop a baby from crawling around in a circle on the floor?
You nail its other hand to the floor.
What's red, small, wet, and crawls up your leg?
A homesick abortion.
What do you call a fly without wings?
A walk.