So Santa fell down the chimney, but it was a lit chimney...his name's no longer Santa. It's Crisp Cringle. Pls send help :)
Most people say I'm a clown. Yet they don't laugh at my jokes. Most people avoid me because I'm a "clown". Yet I'm not the center of the circus. But I know I'm gonna be a clown forever. Because I can't take this damn mask off, no matter how hard I try.
Weeks later: Finally I found out why I'm being called a clown...because my smiling face is fake...
I told my friend that we should dress up as P. Diddy and Drake for Halloween and ask parents if their kid wants to come over for a sleepover.
What do orphans be on Halloween?
They be themselves.
I bet for Halloween you were a Goblin. How about you gobble deez nuts?
I love telling stories as theatrical plays. When we had a free dress day near Christmas, my teacher dressed up as a reindeer, so I got my teacher involved... and shot her.
I was shopping for a halloween costume, but once we got to the ghost section all of the costumes were out of stock! It turned out Pristiano Penaldo was buying them all! I came up to him and asked why he was doing this and he said: I’m sorry, but it’s match day, I must be a ghost 👻👻
Orphan: "I want to be a superhero."
Me: "You should be Batman."
Also me: *starts laughing* because Batman doesn't have parents...
What's a pedophile's favorite holiday?
Halloween. Free delivery!
Why couldn't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he had no BODY to go with.
What does an emo do on Halloween? They hang like a decoration.
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
He had nobody to go with.
What does a man with no arms or legs do on Halloween?
Nothing.
On Halloween you better hide your candy, or else there will be a fella named Big Dick Randy.
*True story*
I saw this guy with a very bad hairline who was painting himself blue and it said "Smurf Paint," but I shouted, "Megamind!"
You're so fat, the only thing you could be for Halloween is the Kool-Aid Man.
What kind of mask are you wearing?
An Elon Musk!
What do you call a dino stripper?
A dinohore.
A father of five puts on a gas mask and a hazard suit and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked, "Dad, what are you wearing?"
The father answered with, "A costume for Halloween."
The child asked, "Can I join?" He said no, for he said it's their last Halloween. After that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.
I complimented my neighbor's skeleton decoration for Halloween, but they just told me that it's their anorexic daughter.
