Cool Jokes

Me : “You guys wanna know a cool fact?” Friend 1 : “Yeah” Friend 2 : “Yea” Me : “Japan is RIGHT that way. If we swim all night...we’ll be able to get to Japan.” Friend 3 : “I love anime.” Friend 1 & 2 : “Nononononononononono!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Me : *Laughs at Friend 3*

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

A robot walks into a bar and orders a martini. The bartender is flabbergasted that a robot can do that. "new around here?" said the bartender "nah, been here awile" said the robot Bartender "you can talk?" robot "yeah, pretty cool huh." bartender "why do you want a martini" robot "oh, i'm just in the mood for one, you know?" The bartender is shocked to see a robot making completely normal small talk. The robot seems to be just like a normal human, "wow, who programmed you?" asked the bartender "the top minds in the world." said the robot. The robot speaks again, "I have a question for you..." Bartender, "what?" "Why did you read this entire story, it does not have a punchline, I just wasted your time, Get bamboozled nerd!"

2 fe male mouse met and one spoke yesterday I met a mouse he was black and he had wings and he had some cool sharp teeth he said he only at night

other mouse : ummm...thats a bat

that asshole he told me that he is a pilot

Why is there Air Conditioning at a Hospital?

To keep the vegetables cool and fresh.

yum

[ when a cop meets a pothead on April 20th ]

Officer : Hi, how high are you?

Pothead : No officer, it's how are you

Officer : oh im sorry ive been high since last night

Pothead : cool, i'd like to give you sum weed, happy 420 sir

Officer : omg thx man appreciate that

Dislike this if you think orphans are weird like this if you think orphans are cool

Gay Furry Femboys are cool

Cool, new word of the day: Marijuana. “Does Marry wanna smoke a joint?”

Man we all have the one cool sibling then the strong sibling and then you the one who plays on there iPad on computer all day then when you are on vacation you are doing nothing at all

How do butts stay cool in the summer?

They stay in CRACK CONDITIONING

literally no one:why cant you hear the pterodactyl random person:i don't know no one:BECAUSE THEY ARE EXTINCT random person:ha cool i guess

To you, Iron man may seem cool or awesome. But to me, he is pretty ironic.

Words can’t describe how beautiful you are

But numbers can (Lol)

Why was the mushrooms the cool guy at the party:because he was a fungi

"The only way I'd want to be reincarnated is if I can be reincarnated as a man" said the young woman, "why?" said her friend. "Oh, I don't know just men are so cool", "is that the only reason?" said her friend. "Maybe........" said the young woman "Maybe".

My brother thinks hes cool when he just SMELLS

What do you call a sad rabbit? Unhoppy. Why isn't there a sad sunglasses emoji? To show that I am happy but I'm still cool.

STORY OF 2 PEOPLE NOT ME:

Girlfriend: What would you do if I won the lottery? Boyfriend: I would take half and leave you Girlfriend: Ok cool I won 12 dollars heres 6 and don't come back