It did not rain very often when Chuck Norris was a kid.
Why?
Because his favorite childhood song was "Rain Rain Go Away."
Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe. He holds air hostage.
Foi o Chuck Norris que fez o parto da sua mãe.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. It's not dead, just afraid to move.
Chuck Norris met God once. Now God is the puny human.
Chuck Norris once went to hell.
After that, the Devil only falls asleep after he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is a genius for this: Walker Texas Ranger = Wrangler Karate Sex.
Chuck Norris died, but Death was too afraid to tell him.
What is Chuck Norris' favorite Sonic song?
"Open Your Heart."
Chuck Norris came up with the name for Walker, Texas Ranger in sheer brilliance. You can arrange each letter for the name of the show to display the true name being "Wrangler Karate Sex!"
Chuck Norris strangled someone with a cordless phone.
Chuck Norris can toss Jupiter at the Sun with his bare hands.
And he still cannot win a fighting match against Bruce Lee.
Sometimes women are like bad snacks. People try them and then chuck them in the trash.
Chuck Norris' dick is so big that it has its own dick. And his dick's dick is still bigger than Bruce Lee.
Chuck Norris once ate ONE Lays potato chip.
Chuck Norris once stabbed the Terminator with Bruce Lee.
Chuck Norris sent the chicken back across the road.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris?
Chuck Norris knows why the chicken crossed the road.
