When you ask your mom for candy but you grab from the wrong drawer...
Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?
Friend: What?
Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.
My teacher asked what was the worst time you got paddled by your parents. My one friend said that he got in trouble and got whacked by a stick. I raised my hand and said that my dad whacked me with his dick.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They told her to go find the light.
Why did the orphan cry when he got back home?
Because he did not have one.
My dad and I have been playing hide and seek.
It's been 15 years and I still haven't found him.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked.
Are you angry?
Go bully an orphan!
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why do orphans love boomerangs?
They always come back.
Why do orphans have to get an iPhone 12?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Why can't orphans use a phone?
Because they don't have a home screen.
Why couldn’t the orphan run away from home?
Because it didn’t have one.
Why is an orphan afraid to play baseball?
They are afraid they won't find home.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.
Yo, dad went to get milk and still hasn't came back 10 years later!
It's sad when the person that gave you memories becomes a memory.
You know one of the worst feelings ever to exist?
When your parents and friends all still see the happy little kid you used to be...
...but in reality, that kid has been long gone for years. (not my words)
What happens to a baby when you let it run loose? It can't cause it can't run yet.
Does an orphanage have daddy issues?
Yes, because he didn't come back from getting the milk.
There was a kid being mean to another kid at an orphanage. The kid said, "Stop!" but the mean one said, "What are you going to do? Call your mommy?"
