Child

Child jokes

If an orphan wins the lottery, what do they have to use all of it on?

Years of child support!

Why did the orphan stop playing baseball?

He could never get a home run.

Me going to jail after telling the orphan he can't learn about ancient Egypt because he don't know what a mummy is.

What’s the difference between an orphan and a baseball field? The baseball field has a home to run back to.

My girlfriend called me a "pedophile", and I said, "That's a big word for a 5-year-old."

Me explaining my child: when your mom is sitting on a table during her period, it's called the periodic table.

A police officer came up to me and said, "Just why, why would you bring the epileptic children to a laser tag fight?"

Mom tells her son to go to the other kid, to walk to the kid just standing still, to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car.

But her son was blind, the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk, and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap, and the kid died because he couldn't hear; he was deaf.

Orphans have 362 days in a year because they don’t have a Mother’s or Father’s Day and no birthday.

I was walking down the street and saw a kid and I said, "Are you an orphan?"

He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents at first."