Cant jokes
What's black and white and can't turn around in a corridor?
A nun with a javelin through her neck.
W-what does, I mean uh, what is, um-, wh-what’s the difference, no... I mean- I mean what do you call a, um... sorry guys, i-i can’t do this. 😥🥺
*runs away in tears*
The power of yeet.
I can't do this - YEET!
I'm not good at this - YEET!
I'm not old enough - YEET!
I am sorry, but I can't provide information based on links.
Why can't Jordan moan?
Because his parents are in the room next to him. Asleep.
If we can't see air, can fish see water?
What's the difference between an egg and a wank?
You can beat an egg, but you can't beat a wank.
Mom: I saw John Cena at WWE.
Son: No way, you can’t see him though.
Mom: God!
Son: What?
Mom: You watch too much reality TV (comes to smack butt).
Son: Also because I’m John Cena.
Mom: Where, where’d ya go?
John Cena: Hey, Mom.
Mom: I’m only 31, you’re 42.
Have you ever met a kid who’s so fat that they can’t even be accepted to “My 600lb Life”? They need a higher-ranking one!
I can't see the bee.
It's by the beehive.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why do Asians don’t wear contacts? Cause they can’t fitt.
Puerto Rican teen: I'm a waste, a failure, NUNCA LO PODRA ASER (I'll never be able to do it).
The mother: AI NINO (OH CHILD).
The teen: QUE? (WHAT?)
The mother: NO TE PONGA CON ESTA MIELDA OTRAVES! (DON'T START WITH THIS SHIT AGAIN!)
The teen: I CAN'T DO SHIT RIGHT MAMA!
The mother: OOOHHH YEAH WELL TU SI PUEDES ABLAR MIELDA DE TI, I BOTAR BASURA! (YOU SURE CAN TALK CRAP ABOUT YOURSELF AND THROW OUT THE TRASH.)
The teen: QUAL (WHICH).
The mother: MADRE DE DIOS (MOTHER OF GOD).
The teen: AVIA UNA NEGRA I OTRA BLANKA (THERE WAS A BLACK ONE AND WHITE ONE).
*A phone buzzes.*
The teen: Whose phone is that, ma?
Unknown: MR. PRESIDENT IF YOU TAKE AWAY THE CONFEDERATE FLAG HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHO THE BAD WHITE PEOPLE ARE?
*Runs to bag, opens white one and sticks hand in.*
The teen: HAIR GEL
America has white people that are terrorists and racists. They love to blame people from different countries for what they have done.
White person: "We are not terrorists. Why would [we] ever do that in our history?"
The rest of the people: *looks at them stupid* "Y'all were the first motherfuckers to be a terrorist first and then wanting to blame others for your action."
1 person: "You still carrying that confederate flag. It means hatred and [you're] still trying to fight to bring back slaves again. Y'all say it's heritage and not hate, but [you're] clearly still a fucking loser, and your flag has an X [on it, which] means wrong. So... Still a loser. People can't be racist to a racist. It just doesn't make sense. I'm not saying all white people are racist, but I am talking about the ones who voted for Trump and be blind as hell. FUCK DONALD TRUMP AND THE RACIST PEOPLE!"
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
'Cause she's a woman.
No, really. Why can't she drive?
Because she died.
When your husband can’t afford a punching bag, he uses his wife.
Why can't orphans go to the store? Because they throw everything around.
Yo mama is so fat she can't even get in her own car because she's fat.
Why can’t orphans go to a field trip?
Parent signature: __________
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t get a home run.