Cant jokes
Why can’t orphans go on “go big or go home?”
Cuz they’d always have to go big as they have no home.
Orphans can’t work at Johnson and Johnson because it’s a family company.
Why can't Stephen Hawking go metal detecting?
Because when it beeps, it's him!
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
What do you call a cow you can’t see?
Camooflauged.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
Aliana is so fat, she can't fit through a hula hoop.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They ain't got no home to run to.
You can't give an orphan homework.
Why can't an orphan go on away games?
Their parent will never show up!
Q: Why can't you tell 9/11 jokes in a comedy club?
A: They always crash and burn.
Your mama's breath smells so bad, people can't wait for her to fart.
Why can't orphans play poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
Why can't orphans have a computer?
They don't have a home page.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't have a home.
Why can't an orphan have sex?
Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."
Attention to everyone, I'm not going to be on for 2 weeks because I was in a bike accident, or more like a motorcycle accident. I was ran off the road when my 16 year old brother was taking me for a ride. Now I can't use my legs cause, well, you know. I will be taking a break because I don't want to move my legs that much.
What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick up a dead baby's ass.
Why can’t Sally hang herself?
She does not have arms.
"Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!"