Cant jokes
The cold winter night, there was a cabin in the woods. The cabin housed 3 men. The men were gay but they did not know.
Fili: "Fili." Kili: "And Kili." Fili and Kili: "At your service." Kili: "You must be Mr. Baggins." Bilbo: "No! You can’t come in, you’ve come to the wrong house." Kili: "What?! Has it been canceled?" Fili: "No one told us." Bilbo: "Can...! No, nothing’s been canceled." Kili: "That’s a relief." Fili: "Careful with these, I just had them sharpened." Kili: "It’s nice, this place. Did you do it yourself?" Bilbo: "Uh...no, it’s been in the family for years. That’s my mother’s glory box, can you please not do that?" Dwalin: "Fili, Kili, come on, give us a hand." Kili: "Mr. Dwalin." Balin: "Let’s shove this in the hole, or otherwise we’ll never get everyone in." Bilbo: "Ev...everyone?! How many more are there? Oh, no! No, no. There’s nobody home! Go away, and bother somebody else! There’s far too many dwarves in my dining room as it is. If...if this is some blockhead’s idea of a joke, I can only say, it is in very poor taste!" One of the Dwarves: "Get off, you big lump!"
Then the men only had one seat they had in the cabin. It was a bar seat. they were able to flip it upside down and fit all of them on it.
I teach orphans.
But the problem is I can't give them homework.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home run.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
My dad is so good at hiding, even the FBI can't find him.
I worry about him sometimes.
Why can’t a gay person walk a trail? Because a gay person can’t walk on a straight line.
Why can't Mexicans play Uno?
Because they take all the green cards.
Why can’t orphans eat breakfast? Because there is no parent to feed them.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? There is no home plate.
What do Batman and a Black man have in common?
Answer: They can't go anywhere without Robin.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home base is.
Why can’t two Chinese ppl make a white baby? Bc two wongs don't make a white.
Why do teenage girls travel in odd-numbered groups?
Because they can't even.
What has hands but can’t clap?
A thalidomide baby.
Why can't orphans score in baseball?
They can't find home.
What do you call an alligator that can't get hard? A reptile dysfunction.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they have no home base to run to.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they don't have someone to call daddy.
Why can’t Helen Keller drive?
It’s because she’s dead.
Happy birthday to you, you look like a ball, can’t fit in my jaws, I try to suck it.