Cant jokes

Why can't weapons play baseball?

Because they need to get to home base.

Why can't Oregon go to the doctor?

Because they need parents' signature.

You know why orphans can't play baseball? 'Cause they can't find home.

Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor?

Because it can't hit home.

A handicapped person tells a good joke, but he can't be a stand up comedian.

Why can't a girl with no legs play soccer? Because she's a girl.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They can't find home base.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

They can't find their way home.

Why can’t orphans go to the hospital? The front desk always asks, “Where are your parents?”

Why can’t an orphan go to a youth church? Because they need a parent to pick them up.

Friend: Hi, orphan.

Orphan: Tell me a yo momma joke.

Friend: ummm

Orphan: Exactly, U can't.

Friend: Yo momma so disappointed she left!

The cold winter night, there was a cabin in the woods. The cabin housed 3 men. The men were gay but they did not know.

Fili: "Fili." Kili: "And Kili." Fili and Kili: "At your service." Kili: "You must be Mr. Baggins." Bilbo: "No! You can’t come in, you’ve come to the wrong house." Kili: "What?! Has it been canceled?" Fili: "No one told us." Bilbo: "Can...! No, nothing’s been canceled." Kili: "That’s a relief." Fili: "Careful with these, I just had them sharpened." Kili: "It’s nice, this place. Did you do it yourself?" Bilbo: "Uh...no, it’s been in the family for years. That’s my mother’s glory box, can you please not do that?" Dwalin: "Fili, Ki­li, come on, give us a hand." Kili: "Mr. Dwalin." Balin: "Let’s shove this in the hole, or otherwise we’ll never get everyone in." Bilbo: "Ev...everyone?! How many more are there? Oh, no! No, no. There’s nobody home! Go away, and bother somebody else! There’s far too many dwarves in my dining room as it is. If...if this is some blockhead’s idea of a joke, I can only say, it is in very poor taste!" One of the Dwarves: "Get off, you big lump!"

Then the men only had one seat they had in the cabin. It was a bar seat. they were able to flip it upside down and fit all of them on it.

I teach orphans.

But the problem is I can't give them homework.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find home run.

Why can't orphans be gay?

Because they have no one to call "daddy."

My dad is so good at hiding, even the FBI can't find him.

I worry about him sometimes.

Why can’t a gay person walk a trail? Because a gay person can’t walk on a straight line.

Why can't Mexicans play Uno?

Because they take all the green cards.

Why can’t orphans eat breakfast? Because there is no parent to feed them.

Why can’t orphans play baseball? There is no home plate.