Canning jokes

Why do the orphans not play baseball?

They can never find home.

Why do orphans love to go to church?

Because they can finally call someone "father!"

Yo mama, why do you have to jump in the pool as soon as I can find the water on Mario? I mean, Mario jump to Mars!

A magic genie tells Tom, "I can make anything of yours disappear!"

Tom raises his mug and says, "Okay, get rid of my tea."

Genie: Poof!

Tom: It didn't work.

How is a beer can and an Indian the same? You can find them both smashed on the side of the road!

I’m lost. Can you give me directions to your heart?

I can tell you used to be friends with your hairline, cuz it goes way back.

Why can't we see or sense kamikazes' bombs?

They're out of plane sight.

That forehead is so tall it can eat a plane! Open wide!

Why can orphans travel so much?

They don't get homesick.

What war game can the French win? None, they are always losing.

Why can't orphans have gay sex?

They have no one to call "daddy."

What do cannibals call an orphanage? All you can eat buffet.

How can a gay man that is unemployed be productive in the workplace?

Give a blowjob to other gay men in the workplace for money.

Hey any riding with Biden fans out there?

I ran out of gas and could really use a ride so if one of ya'll can call me and pick me up that'd be great and I can't get gas because I only have 20 bucks which is like 1-5 and a half, help me please.

Orphans can't call their parents if they get hurt! Sorry.🩹

Little Johnny said to his mate, "I bet I can make you swear." His mate said, "Good luck." So Johnny told his mate that he slept with his sister. His mate yelled, "I'm gonna fucking kill you!"

Can bees fly in the rain?

Not if they don't have their yellow jackets!

Husband: I look fat, can someone compliment me?

Wife: You have good eyesight.

Why do orphans play GTA?

So they can get wanted.