There was a family, the father's name was Mad, the mother is brain, the brother's name is nobody and the sister's name is everybody. One day, nobody killed everybody and the father ran to the police's office and screamed, ''NOBODY KILLED EVERYBODY!!!!!'' ''Sir, are you okay?'' The police asked. ''I said, NOBODY KILLED EVERYBODYYYYY!!!!!'' The father yelled even louder. ''Are you mad?'' The police asked. ''Yes because my name is Mad!'' The father exclaimed. ''Where's your brain?'' Asked the police. ''At home because my wife name is Brain.'' The father said. The police fell down due to the confusion.
Riddles not jokes
What has 4 legs but cannot walk?
What has bark but no bite?
There's a one-story house in which everything is orange. Orange walls, orange doors, orange furniture. What color are the stairs?
What has holes but can carry water?
What is in front of you, but cannot be seen?
What is something you have inside you that is pink, but cannot be seen?
What can you catch but not throw?
and last one
What can rule, but not command?
Tell meh the answers in the comments
like 90% of this was from this link: https://parade.com/947956/parade/riddles/
1 more thing: DoN"t google it or search it up, use ur brain to answer these.
Sarcastic Doctor: Tell me
Guy: I have leukemia in the brain
Sarcastic Doctor: That doesn't cancern me
A brain eats cheddar cheese
On the plus side, I finally hear voices talking to me... just wish they outside my head
What food makes you smart? Salt, because it's a MINED food
Why did trump's brain cross the road to get to the other side oh wait there is no other side
One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer...but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out. "I'm so sorry," he declared! "I don't know what came over me, and realize I shouldn't have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way...what did the chicken do?" đđ
A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a beer. After 10 shots of vodka they guy had, the bartender figured if he talked to him he would tell him everything as heâs not sober.
Bartender: Hey thatâs some nice jewellery you have there it must be expensive.
Guy: Yeah this bracelet is made of 100% diamond. It costs me like 250 thousand dollars. What a bargain eh.
Bartender: Seems like you make a lot of money. What you do for a living?
Guy: I take cash from the bank and donât give it back. It takes a lot of moral courage to rob banks to provide for my family.
Bartender: What? If thatâs the case then why do you even pay for the jewellery or this beer. Youâre a hypocrite thatâs what you are, justifying robbing people as a living.
Guy: Hypocrite? Youâre right I m living with double standards to justify my actions.
(5 seconds later)
Guy: Aye open the cash register and give me your wallet or I will blow your fucking brains out. I fucking hate hypocrites and I will not gonna be one of em!
A womens knitters group is having a meeting and they are all pregnant. They all talk about their pregnancies. One woman says "I'm taking vitamin C so my baby has a healthy immune system". Another knitter says "I'm taking Folic acid to help my baby's brain". Finally one woman says "I'm taking Thalidomide". All the women turn to her and say "Thalidomide ! Don't you know your baby could be born without arms?" The woman shrugs her shoulders and says "I don't know how to knit arms". (Told to me by a woman knitter)
What has more brains than a student in a school shooting, the wall behind them
Scientists say I'm made up of 75% of water
But after jumping in the ocean its 100%just like my depression.
Question: Whats the smallest thing on earth?
Answer: Your brain
Whatâs the best thing about Alzheimerâs? You can hide your own Easter Eggâs!!
my friend; yo stupid me; is that right and what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you einstien My friend; rolls eyes and says whatever me; keep on rolling them you might find your brain in there
My friend: "Yo, stupid." Me: "Is that right? And what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you Einstein?" My friend: *rolls eyes* and says, "Whatever." Me: "Keep on rolling them; you might find your brain in there."
Two muffins are sitting in a bar.
The first muffin says to the bartender, "I'll have the usual".
The second one does not say anything to the bartender because muffins lack the vocal ability of humans and even with the proper anatomy capable of speech access, they would most certainly be entirely unable to comprehend the human language. In fact, the first muffin would indefinitely not be able to provide speech to the bartender. The muffins also lack the muscular structure to be capable of support themselves to being suspended also preventing their access to movement. Even with the human like structure, muffins lack brains which are an essential part to being able to send nerve contact within the legs to be able to move. Also with them lacking a brain structure entirely prevents them from speech. The anatomy simply prohibits the food items mentioned to be able to carry out any of the tasks required to get them to said bar and be able to speak. Thus making the situation untruthful and completely idiotic.
Broccoli says" I look like a tree" Walnut says "I look like a brain", Cashew says "I look like a kidney", Banana says "can we change the topic please? "
Archer riddle has less atoms in his brain then he does in his dick and his dick is a 1/4 of a millimetre
Free will is like having a vagina you don't need to know how to use it and you don't need to know what it does but what matters is that you have it.
