Bone jokes

What's blue and bad for your teeth?

A green brick that's painted blue after the original paint dries (it takes a little while to dry), but after it dries you can paint it and then it will be green. If the brick is green it is called a green brick as it is green (not blue anymore) and it hurts your teeth because brick is a hard material that can damage the bones in your mouth (also known as your teeth).

What is the difference between underaged privileged children with bone cancer and you?

I like you!

Why did the skeleton die from laughter?

'Cause they broke all his "funny bones!"

Papyrus was playing with the human, but then Papyrus fell and he broke the cell bone of the human.

Hey paps, BONE-appetit!

(Just eat your spaguetti.)

Sans: What am I using?

A trom-bone!

A skeleton decided to become an assassin.

He was always skull-king around!

What is a skeleton’s favorite singer?

Pelvis Presley.

I got fired for not doing enough work.

Guess I didn’t put enough backbone into it.

Why do emo kids not run? Because their bodies will tear apart from the bones from all the cuts.

What did the bones on the moon tell the astronaut?

The cow never made it.

Papyrus ran headfirst into a windmill. Guess you can call him a bonehead.

A French Sans would greet you with the "o bone-jour".

What’s a skeleton's favorite instrument?

The trom-BONE.

I was in an argument with a "friend" at school. He said, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."

...so I threw a dictionary at him.

I have 206 bones in my body, but when I look at you, I have 207.

Me: Okay, Papyrus. I'm no Sherlock Bones, but I'd say that Storyspin Sans is the Imposter.

Papyrus: HUMAN, WHY ARE YOU SAD?

Me: I'm just BONELY.

Sans: Good one kiddo.

A dog found a bone. Then he was walking happily across the street, and he saw a bridge. He decided to walk on the bridge. He saw his reflection and thought it was another dog. Then he barked at him, and the bone fell in the river. The dog said, "What a fool I have been," and walked away.

I'll break your bones, b*tch.