Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing!
You know they say, when you get lemos make lemonade...Well i took that a little bit too literal
Turns out squeezing your wife's tits as hard as you can hurts them.
But at least lemonade came out!
How do you call a very good lemonade?Fantatastic
What is an army members top drink?
WARter
What kind of tea is hard to swallow?
Reali-tea
What type of doctor is Doctor Pepper?
A Fizzician.
In honor of Michael Jackson, Starbucks is introducing the Jackson Latte'. It's 50 year old coffee, with 8 year old cream. Get it while supplies last
Steven hawking walks into a bar, the bartender says... WAITTTT WHATTT
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Little Johnny is smokin' hard, The sun looks like Mountain Dew.
White Russians do you mean ree,white, blue and dead white Russians?
Why aren’t apple chargers called apple juice. Also How do u throw away trash cans?
What do me and Monster cans have in common? A barcode.
If she’s old enough to smoke She’s old enough to choke If she’s old enough to pee She’s old enough for me
Pass me the sugar, Sugar!
Pass me the honey, Honey!
Pass me the teabag!
What's a depressed persons favourite drink
Depresso espresso
Nah just kidding it's bleach
What do you call depressed coffee?
Despresso ;)
I am in trouble my mum ask me to get six cans of sprit
But I got seven ups
I love almond milk. It’s unlike any udder milk.
Why did little Timmy dip the cookie in water? “ Because his dad never brought the milk.”
What goes in small and soft And comes out big and hard A tea bag