The Gold Coast Titans winning the NRL. Best joke ever.
Lol, I keep stealing my dad's medication money, and the best part is he never remembers.
Why'd the chicken cross the road?
That doesn't matter, we need to get the best joker to go back to posting here, he was funny but now people say they are him and ruin his good name, he was the top of the charts for over a year, so screw all these chumps! Bring back THE REAL SPECIAL!!!
Also, the chicken dies in the end, ha ha, funny, whatever.
Superman and Flash were in the living room pounding back a few beers. Flash says to Superman, "I bet you can fly into Wonder Woman's bedroom and get the best pussy of your life." So he does it. When he goes back to Flash, Superman says, "Man, that was great, but my ass kinda burns."
9/11 pilots are the best readers.
They went through 30 stories in less than an hour.
What time is it when you get home? Can you walk me home, and then get home? Then I can walk you home, and walk home.
I love it when cancer hits like a ton of bricks. The best part is when it kills people.
POV: Wine Taster in hell.
I was sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. This silhouette begins to speak, "You have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. Then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. Your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. How do you plead?"
The man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit.
"Guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like? I will take any punishment you deem fit."
"Very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request."
Out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. The boy says, "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." The boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, taste like chicken."
Two guys were on a hunting trip, and after the first day of hunting, they didn’t see anything, so they decided the next day they would split up and meet back at the fire at dinner time.
After a day of hunting, they meet back at the fire, and one hunter asked the other, “How did your day go?”
The one hunter said, “I had the best day ever! I went down the hill and hunted by the train tracks and saw the hottest chick ever. We had sex for hours in every position you could think of.”
Then the other hunter asked him, “Was she a good lookin’ blond?” And he said, “Oh, I don’t know, I didn’t find her head.”
Nun's worst holiday? Norfolk.
Nun's best holiday? Bangkok.
I thought I had the best K/D ratio in my fighter jet on Battlefield, then I heard about Mohammed Atta.
What is Stephen Hawking's best side?
The left.
Why are emo kids the best jumpers?
Because they never fall down.
I don't joke about 9/11 because I lost my dad. He was the best pilot I ever knew.
Stephen Hawking's best subjects were Physics and Maths. His worst was P.E.
I got a PS5 for my nine-year-old sister. At the time, I thought it was the best trade I’d ever made. But now I’m regretting not being able to molest her anymore.
Are your forehead and your hairline best friends because they look like they go way back?
Germany is the best!
I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.
Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.
For me, the best part of depression is remaining charming around strangers but saving the misery for the ones who love you.
