Basketball jokes
This is for all of the men.
What do you call a penis that disappears? A Magic Johnson.
What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
A milkshake!
Why don't fish play basketball?
Because they're scared of the net!
Why can't you play the guitar on a fish?
Because you can't tuna fish!
What do you call an American bee?
A USB!
What fruit likes to go down the slide?
Kiwiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!
That's all my jokes in mind, y'all!
How do you stop a gang of black men from raping a white girl?
Throw them a basketball.
Kobe never died, he just faded away.
What do you call an older white man surrounded by young black men in the 1800s?
Master.
What do you call an older white man surrounded by young black men in the 2000s?
Coach.
It's okay if you miss while saying "Kobe" because he didn't make it either.
A skinny black person named "Treyvon Robinson" joins a pickup basketball game at the local court, trash-talking about his "superior athletic genes" while munching on a stolen bag of Skittles. The ref blows the whistle for a foul, and he argues, "That ain't fair, I'm just naturally dominant!"
But the team's coach, a burly black dude who's been eyeing him all game, grabs him by the jersey, blindfolds him with a sweaty headband, slathers lube from his gym bag all over, and pile-drives his ass courtside in a twisted BDSM slam dunk, yelling, "Now taste the rainbow, punk!"
What did Kobe say to the helicopter?
"Don't crash!"
I wonder if Kobe Bryant enjoyed his last flight.
Your mom is so dumb that she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
Kobe likes his shoes like the way he died.
Air.
What do you call a basketball player with erectile dysfunction?
Tragic Johnson.
Why was the rapper bad at basketball?
He could only dribble rhymes.
What do sexists and WNBA fans have in common?
There's enough of them to acknowledge their existence.
Why did the rapper bring a basketball to the studio?
Because they wanted to drop some hoops.
Why did the rapper bring a basketball to the concert?
To drop some SLAM DUNKS on the mic!
You can find perfectly cooked Kobe in a Japanese restaurant, but you can only find burnt Kobe in Calabasas.
What bee doesn’t fly properly?
Kobe.
I think Kobe misunderstood the 6-ft rule.
Rizz
Are you a basketball hoop? 'Cause I want to put my balls in you.
Are you a photo biographer? 'Cause I can picture us together.