Elementary jokes

Grandpa: "You can't have phones within 15 feet of the table."

Me: "And you aren't allowed within 100 feet of the elementary school."

Like this if you are in elementary, middle school, or high school.

What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?

I don't know, I'm just the drone pilot.

How do you tell the difference between a Palestinian elementary school and a terrorist training camp?

Answer... I don't know, I just fly the drone.

I don't understand why, when I went to the shooting range today, the police came. Like, bro, I always go to elementary schools.

What's the main similarity between an elementary school math class and the USA?

The class divides.

Where do pedophiles go hunting?

Elementary schools.

Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*

Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?

Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~

A young boy walked up to his dad and asked, "Daddy, why are you banned from coming to elementary school?"

The dad calmly replies, "Because that's how I met your mother."

What do you get when you cross a pedophile and an elementary school? Predator 3.

What did the priest say when he walked into an elementary school?

Let us prey.

A priest sees a man about to commit suicide. The man says, "I have nothing to live for here. I will die, go to Heaven, and get 72 virgins." Then the priest says, "No need for this. I will take you to the local elementary school."

What grade is the worst, like if in elementary?

What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?

— Don't ask me. How should I know? I'm just the drone pilot.

What grade does Sherlock hit on girls from?

Elementary, my dear Watson!

Elementary school kids: School is fun.

Me: Yeah, yeah, just keep believing that.

What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were out on a hike. They had been going all day, so they decided to make camp and stay for the night. They both woke up at 3 A.M.

Holmes said, "Look up, Watson, what can you see?"

"Judging from the position of the stars, it looks like it's about 3 A.M."

"What else, Watson?"

"It looks like it will be a beautiful day tomorrow."

"What Else, Watson?"

"What am I supposed to see, Holmes?"

"Elementary my dear Watson, someone stole our tent!"

What’s yellow and can’t swim??

A school bus with elementary kids.

The kids at Robb Elementary School went in to read books. Instead, they got dozens of magazines.