B.A.L.L.S. jokes

It’s nice hitting it from the back when my wife has wide hips.

Her butt cheeks look like big huge ball sacks as my thighs smack up against them when I’m thrusting. I like to finish off by grinding my weiner up and down her back like a gay man frotting his schlong on his partner’s ding dong.

Why does an orphan love baseball? Because their ball comes back, get pranked, bitch!

Me: I call my girl Cinderella.

Friend: Why?

Me: Because she loves balls.

Little Johnny was in class and the teacher said, "Okay class, what's behind my back?" She said, "It's round and red," and Sally said, "Ooh, ooh, it's an apple!" And the teacher said, "No, but I like where you're going with this." So now the teacher said, "It is also used to make multiple things," and Sally said, "Ooh, ooh, it's a container of paint!" And the teacher said, "Again, no, but I like where you're going with this." And the teacher said, "It's a ball of yarn," as she pulled it out from behind her back. Then Little Johnny said, "Okay, my turn." He said, "What's in my pocket? It's round and it has a head." And the teacher said, "That's enough, Johnny, now sit down." And Little Johnny pulled the thing out of his pocket and said, "It's a nickel, but I like where you're going with this."

Hey, you know Slugma?

Slugma balls.

Last night I had sex and she said, "Stop talking about s***, OMG!" and I made her scream so loud she said, "Her balls hurt!"

my grandfather cant a woman's taco anymore cause his balls fell off from getting to many tacos

I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dad's friend and I would take him home. He just curled up into a ball and started crying. Kidnapping must be easy.

I was wondering why the tennis ball was getting bigger 🤔

Then it hit me 🤧😂

What is Godzilla’s least favorite ball?

A King Kong ball.

Ligma.

Ligma balls.

I respect cancer more than I respect depression.

At least cancer has the balls to kill you himself.

When you go to a baseball game and they say, "Heads up!" and you put your head up, and the ball hits you in the head.

Balls in your jaws.

Why is a ball rolling when you put it on a hill?

Because it is circle.

I stole one's balls.

Someone stole my balls :(

I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!

Kenya? Ligma balls!

Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?

Because every time it was sung... the line “fire away” caused massive confusion and shooting!