Back jokes

Are your forehead and your hairline best friends because they look like they go way back?

Ugly face dude: Hi kiddo!

Kid: Hi kid. Leaves.

Kid turns back and says: Wait a minute, who are you?

Your hairline is so far back my grandpa said he had a glimpse of it in the 1960s.

McDonald's called back and they said they want their logo back.

Your hairline's so far back, you need binoculars to see it.

Man, your hairline is so far back, archaeologists couldn't find it.

Your hairline went so back, you had to cry to your mama!

I did this to my ex. I stole her wheelchair. I knew she would come crawling back.

[concert] SINGER: How's everyone doin' tonight? CROWD: Woo! ME (from the back in a normal speaking voice): It's actually been a tough few months.

One time I fucked this chick so hard, she almost came back to life.

So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.

The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"

Friend: My mum took my phone from me, and I really want it back.

Me: Yeah, well, Hades took my parents from me, and the funny thing is, I don't want them back.

A man and a boy went into a forest. The boy said he was scared. The man said, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone."

A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"

What is the best way to make a leaf?

Go down, back around, and stir up a tree. Make it spin, watch again. Oven baking, ding, we're done!

— Can I borrow a book [on] how to kill myself?

— Librarian: No, because you won’t bring it back.

What's the difference between Madeleine McCann and a boomerang?

The boomerang is guaranteed to come back.

You better get used to having dry cereal cuz your dad ain't never bringing the milk back.

What do you call Shroud when he is hurt?

ShrOWd.

Guess what, Shroud is back on wje, I don't know why, but he is...

I finally asked my deadbeat dad what makes him happy. His answer? He hasn't gotten back to me.

Your hairline is so far back, scientists consider it a ninth planet.