Back jokes

A man and a boy went into a forest. The boy said he was scared. The man said, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone."

A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"

What is the best way to make a leaf?

Go down, back around, and stir up a tree. Make it spin, watch again. Oven baking, ding, we're done!

— Can I borrow a book [on] how to kill myself?

— Librarian: No, because you won’t bring it back.

What's the difference between Madeleine McCann and a boomerang?

The boomerang is guaranteed to come back.

You better get used to having dry cereal cuz your dad ain't never bringing the milk back.

What do you call Shroud when he is hurt?

ShrOWd.

Guess what, Shroud is back on wje, I don't know why, but he is...

I finally asked my deadbeat dad what makes him happy. His answer? He hasn't gotten back to me.

Your hairline is so far back, scientists consider it a ninth planet.

Your hairline is so far back that if you were a backbencher in class and I was a germ sitting on it, I would think that the rest of the backbenchers are seated in front of the class.

Your forehead and hairline are like friends; they go way back.

Your mama is so ugly whenever she threw a boomerang, it refused to come back.

The kid's dad was a magician because he disappeared and never came back.

When you send your girl a dick pic, but she says it's small, so you text back and say:

"Enjoy the little things."

When you have a box of dead babies in your garage and one of them is alive at the bottom and has to eat its way out but goes back for seconds.

Why do so many kids love boomerangs? Because they always come back.

My history teacher asked my class what time they would go back to just to see what happened.

I said I'd go back to Hitler's childhood to tell him the lies that he becomes the ruler of the world by starting the Nazis, and leave his death out of the discussion.

CEO Intrepid entrepreneur born in 1964, Jeffrey, Jeffrey Bezos.

Repeat, come on Jeffrey, you can do it, pave the way, put your back into it, tell us why, show us how, look at where you came from, look at you now.

Zuckerberg and Gates and Musk, they're the anchors, can make and sick it up there with drink their blood, come on Jeff get it! Dododoododododod

Dear Victims... äh Passengers, we are flying now from Ryadh to New York. Amazing Building... äh Amazing City. There's online, but 2000 there were two Towers... äh Restaurants. We hijack the plane... äh Hi Jack. Jack is my co-pilot, and I said hello. Don‘t scream... History Repea... äh... History never comes back, we are now flying back to the Airport. 💀

Why do orphans like cows?

Because when they leave, they bring back the milk.