Back jokes

You're so ugly that when you were born, the doctor threw you out the window, and the window threw you back.

Your hairline went so back, you had to cry to your mama!

Why did Jesus come back from the dead? He forgot to tell you that you're gay!

Are your forehead and your hairline best friends because they look like they go way back?

Ugly face dude: Hi kiddo!

Kid: Hi kid. Leaves.

Kid turns back and says: Wait a minute, who are you?

Why do orphans like the number seven? It's lucky, so maybe their parents will come back.

I was walking in a park today and a little girl I asked, "Where are your parents?" She said, "Gone. My dad went to go get the milk and never came back," and I said, "Oof."

My boyfriend dumped me. Guess who came back crawling for his zimmer frame?

I got fired for not doing enough work.

Guess I didn’t put enough backbone into it.

Why is the sand always pissed off?

Because the sand never waves back!

If you execute someone in ventricular fibrillation in the electric chair, will they come back to life once and then die?

Your hairline is so far back that when I wrote it on a chalkboard, it did not erase.

You're so fat that when you went sunbathing at the beach, Greenpeace came along and pushed you back in the ocean.

Why do orphans hate any milk?

Their dad did not come back for 10 years. Oh, sorry, he got lost in the store! 🤧

What does a pirate say to the president?? Spread your legs so I can get my treasure back.

So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.

The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"

A man and a boy went into a forest. The boy said he was scared. The man said, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone."

A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"

[concert] SINGER: How's everyone doin' tonight? CROWD: Woo! ME (from the back in a normal speaking voice): It's actually been a tough few months.

I did this to my ex. I stole her wheelchair. I knew she would come crawling back.