Ares jokes
Why is it painful to have your attorney with you in the hospital?
The damages are severe.
Why can't an orphan get offended?
What are they gonna do, tell their mom?
You know that feeling when you're going through a school parking lot and go over a speed bump, then you realize that there are no speed bumps?
Why are Michael Jackson and caviar so much in common?
They both come on little white crackers.
What would a man say to flirt with a woman that has a big butt?
You are so butty-ful!
Flat earthers are completely wrong. If the earth was flat, I would have yeeted myself off the edge years ago!
You can beat up orphans, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Do you ever get that feeling where you're just going through a school parking lot, then you realize that there are no parking lots?
I rang my boss and said, "I’m really sick. I won’t be coming into work." My boss said, "Davo, you're sick again! Really! Just how sick are you now?" I replied, "Well, I’m in bed with my sister!"
Roses are white, violets are white, everything is white. I’m racist.
What are the similarities between a pedophile and a 9/11 plane?
They both came from behind and crushed them.
There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"
The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."
The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”
You tell an orphan joke to an orphan. You start laughing, they start crying. They say they are going to tell their mom. Then you start laughing harder.
Joe Biden walks into the White House kitchen.
"Are those brownies I smell?" he asks.
"Indeed, they are," he was told.
"Gee," he says, "they smell nothing like Girl Scouts!"
Bully: "Shut up and give me your money, otherwise I will tell everyone that you are still a virgin."
Boy: "Haha, I am not a virgin anymore."
Bully: "Haha, nice joke."
Boy: "If you don't believe then ask your sister or brother."
Bully: "Hah, I don't have any sibling."
Boy: "Will just wait for 9 months then u will know."
Me: (Jaiden) Why are you crying? Do you know where your parents are?
Orphan: *Sobs* "No."
God, I love working at an orphanage!
Me: "Hey, are your parents home?"
Orphan: "Stop calling here!"
Me in the corner.
When you are eating delicious street food in China and you ask the chef: You: "Is this chicken?" Chef: "No, its meow meow."
Man: Stop with these orphan jokes!
Me: Why? Are they going to tell their parents on me?
"You are under arrest for illegally downloading the entire Wikipedia!"
"Wait! I can explain everything!"