Ares jokes
Girl: "Hey, why don't you come over?"
Guy: "I can't. Cops are looking for me, they say I killed 2 people."
Girl: "C'mon, my parents aren't home."
Guy: "About that..."
You guys are better than a triple-scoop ice cream cone... with sprinkles!
Why are New Yorkers scared of airplanes?
Are you a marry, because you are my mother?
Mum: Why are you throwing a paper plane at the twins?
Me: 😈
Orphans are lonely.
The cheetah and lion are racing. The cheetah wins.
The lion says, "Man, you a cheetah."
The cheetah says, "Nah, you lion!"
"Man, your jokes about homicide are totally killer!"
Hey, are you suicide? 'Cause I dream of you every day! <3
Twin Tower jokes are just plane.
Why are the Twin Towers mad?
They ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.
Obama, Trump, and Clinton are on the Titanic. The ship hits the iceberg and is going down.
Obama: "This is terrible! We've got to do something -- save the women and children!"
Trump: "Screw the women and children!"
Clinton: "Do you think we have time...?"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who are you? Are you an owl or something?
What does a cigar and a hamster have in common?
Both are completely harmless until you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.
The 9/11 and the Spanish flu are kind of similar.
The Spanish flu was a very dangerous flu, and in 9/11, something very dangerous flew.
Women are like towers, the man wants to bang them both.
Orphans are pretty tough. I mean, you never see them running home...
No one cares if you bully an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Jokes are like your grandparents, old and dead.
Why are emos useful in stores? A: Their barcodes give them discounts.