Are jokes
Have you ever seen a baby unicorn? No! Because unicorns are gay rainbows in equine form.
Enough of the sex jokes! I mean, come on, they are not even funny!
I tell short people to reach for the stars.
They are always a bit short of reach.
What is the similarity between an anti-joke and a clown? Neither are funny.
A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little boy says, "That’s my little red race car."
Ten minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little girl says, "That’s my little red race car garage."
So later that night, the little boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She said yes, and then they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won’t fit.
Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs up the stairs, flips on the lights and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?"
The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn’t fit, so I cut the back wheels off."
Memes
Why are cops worried about drunk drivers and not elderly drivers?
What did a man say to his boy?
You are my son.
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
"What are you shaking for? She’s going to eat me!"
Do you know why I don't like stairs? They are always up to something. #dadjokes
Are you Shane Dawson?
Because I can be your pussy.
Why were the Twin Towers afraid of the New York Jets?
Because they are afraid of the jet.
Are you a school bus? Because I want to fill you with kids.
When there are more suicidal people, it means there are fewer suicidal people. That means there is an infinite generator of them.
Roses are red, violets are bl-- oh yeah, I'm bad at jokes.
I saw a kid crying and I asked him where his parents are.
I love my job at the orphanage.
Are you a border? 'Cause I can't get over you.
9/11 jokes are that deadly not even the towers could hold themselves up.
Why are Americans bad at chess? They lost their towers.
Why are white people so white?
Because they forgot to urine on lotion.
My son caught me masturbating. He asked me, "What are you doing?" and I said, "Don't worry, son, you'll be doing it soon." He asks, "Why is that?" and I said, "My arm's getting tired."