Appearance jokes

I was going to tell a joke about a mirror, but it seems that I'm looking at one.

You're so skinny, your mom actually enjoyed your birth!

You're so skinny, when you did your first jump on a pogo stick you would never come back.

You're so skinny that if I were to put you on a flagpole, you would wave in the wind.

Your hairline is like the universe. It's still waiting to be discovered.

Yo hairline is so bad it looks like a fat person's stomach.

You're so ugly your hairline ran away!

Your hairline is so far back, I couldn't see you even when Will Smith slapped it.

"Dream, yo mama so ugly, when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out!"

Your forehead is so big someone thought it was a billboard.

Your hairline is so bad man, I gave your doctor a breathalyzer.

When you ask your brother where his hairline is, and he points where it's supposed to be, and you say, "I don't see one there."

Your hairline is so far gone that it looks like someone dropped a nuclear bomb on it.

Your teeth are so yellow they slow down traffic.

Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.

Your hairline is so nonexistent, even the universe couldn't find it.

Your face is crustier than the Sahara Desert.

Roses are red, violets are blue,

I’m sorry you look like my old beat up shoe.

Your hairline goes so far back, the dinosaurs saw it before you did.

Your hairline goes so far back it looks like it got slapped back by Will Smith.