ANS jokes
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
Did you know that "girlfriend" at the end, it starts with "end." So does "boyfriend," and "friend" have "end" at the end of it, but "family" at the end it "ily" I love you.
I thought happiness started with an “H.” Why does my happiness start with “U”?
Here’s my hand, please hold it. That way I can say I was touched by an angel.
Why can't an orphan go on a field trip?
'Cause they need parent registration!
What's the worst thing to star in?
An amber alert.
What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?
My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.
Why can't you fool an aborted baby? Because it was not born yesterday.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
How do you win an argument against a emo? kick the chair.
What is black and white and red all over?
An interracial abortion.
What do you call an animal that knows karate? Moose Lee 😊😁
What do you call an orphan family tree?
A tree stump.
An acronym for penis is Proton-enhanced nuclear induction spectroscopy. So just remember, the word "nuclear" is part of a penis.
An emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five... the tree left her hanging.
I spit on an orphan. What is he going to do? Tell his parents?
Why are orphans bad at baseball? They can never find home.
I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: "This'll be interesting."
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple gets picked.
What is the weirdest thing to wear and what is the weirdest thing to say?
Weirdest thing to ware: Socks with sandals, also with flip flops!
Weirdest thing to say: "Would you rather be a bath or a toilet?" "The blue angel sea slug looks like an alien." (weird).
Bonus: Things to ware with other things: Crop top with t-shirt (really hip), Crop top with tights or shorts, dresses with tights! (Cool) Oh well byeeeeeee!
Q. What does a Russian girl do when she gets unexpectedly pregnant?
A. Has an abortion.