ANS jokes
You see, my son is very into astronomy.
Son: How do stars die?
Dad: Usually overdose, son.
I'm such an asshole to my son, my wife divorced me.
Why can't an orphan play basketball?
Because no one will be cheering them on.
If you punch an orphan, they can't do anything; they can't tell their parents.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball??
They can’t hit a home run! 😂
I remember the time Gordon Ramsay did an African food episode... too bad it was so short he couldn’t find any.
What joke do you tell an orphan?
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not your parents.
I remember the time that Gordon Ramsay did an African food episode... it was a short episode. Too bad he couldn’t find any.
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
An orphan walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Buddy, you have to go home." The orphan replies, "Where is home?"
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family portrait.
What’s the difference between an erection and Edward Holland? Nothing, they're both dicks.
If you're going to be a smart ass, you have to be smart, or you're just an ass.
What's the difference between an erection and Edward Holland? Nothing, they're both dicks.
What’s an orphan’s favorite holidays? Mothers’ and Father’s Day.
Orphans are human too! They have parents like all of us, so I don't know why they're saying it's fun to make fun of an orphan. Have you ever been too cold and wondered if your parents are going to have another child and not you? That's not funny! It is %9000,000 NO!!!!!!!!!!
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan?
Because it has no home button.
What do you call an orphan? Homeless.
What's an orphan's worst favorite movie? Home Alone.
Why can't homeless people find a home? Because they're orphans.
My sister: See you at home in about an hour.
Me: Okay.
My sister: Sister, where are you? *She looks out the window.*
Me: Sis, I'm here, can't you see me?
Sister: OMG, she's dead!
Me: Yeah, I know, but can't you see me?
What's the motto for a pizza place that's also an abortion clinic: Your loss is our sauce.
As an Autist, I find these jokes really funny. Thanks for the early 13th birthday present, ya'll :>