ANS jokes

Street

  • Here's what to do if an annoying person keeps talking to you. First, ignore them until they ask you if you're going to respond. Then ask them: if they were walking down the street and a rabid dog suddenly started barking at them, would they get on all fours and bark back? After that, continue to ignore them.

    Orphan

  • Never let an orphan watch Fast and the Furious.

    All they will talk about is how great their family is.

    Child

  • How are an emo kid and a hanging child the same?

    Depends on who's hanging.

    Orphan

  • Why can't an orphan get caught on the hub? They have no parents to catch them.

    Animal

  • My girlfriend said to me, "Dear, I think you have hit an animal, there's blood and dents all over the bonnet."

    I said, "No, love, I'm not waiting for a Black Lives Matter rally."

  • 1
  • Butt crack

  • A teacher walked up to me and said, "How did we get butt cracks?"

    I was like 4, so I said, "You had an earthquake on your booty."

    Bootylicious lol

  • 2
  • Orphan

  • A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."

    Orphan

  • Me: You know your parents were very good people.

    Orphan: Wow, I didn’t know that.

    Me: I know, you're an orphan.