ANS jokes
What's the difference between an onion and a baby? I only tear up cutting the onion.
What's the difference between a pair of jeans and an African baby?
A pair of jeans only has 1 fly.
What's an African's favorite TV show?
Meal Or No Meal!
Girl, come here, my parents aren't home.
Orphan: Mine are never.
Why can't an orphan play kickball?
Because they can't hit home.
What do an orphan and a blind person have in common? They both can't see their parents.
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?
They cry...
They scream... with joy.
"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."
Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...
Me: "What's the difference between an apple and an emo?"
Friend: "I don't know."
Me: An apple actually falls from the tree.
Aaaah, I really wish Stephen Hawking was an organ donor...
I really need some new parts to my go-kart.
An Emo walked up to a tree and put his hand up for a high-five.
But the tree left him hanging.
My mom bought me a car, and she called me an ungrateful b*tch because I sat in my wheelchair the whole time.
A person told an orphan to not move; otherwise, they would kill their parents. What did the orphan do?
It danced its a** off.
What game can an emo play on their wrists without an ink pen?
Tic-tac-toe.
What's it called when an orphan calls 911?
Operator: Hello, is your family okay?
Orphan: I'm an orphan.
Operator: *bruh*
What is it called when an orphan goes on vacation?
Answer: He's making family memories.
One day, someone's ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat, and her ex-boyfriend was there and gave her an apple. Next minute, she had chlamydia. What did the boyfriend do?
When you have an ex, you will notice that the word "ex" is short for "executed," so that's there for yous.
Why was the chicken screaming?
He had an egg stuck in his butt.
I found an alien in my backyard. I put him to work. He went to a farm, and I never saw him again. Moments later, he is on the Daily Planet acting as a reporter. A green rock smashed my house. I called him back, and he passed out.
I remarked, "You lazy!"
Last week I felt so high and mighty I thought I could fly. I took one shot, puffed through my pipe, and jumped in the air on a trampoline. I woke up in heaven.
I asked an angel, "How did I die?"
"Well, little monkey, you thought your bed was a trampoline and you hit your head. Your mom called the doctor, and the doctor said you were dead."