ANS jokes
What do a stool and an emo have in common?
They both sit still.
My uncle and I have somewhat of an awkward relationship. At times I find him a bit hard to swallow.
What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?
Family photo.
I made an orphan's website, but there was no homepage--because they don't have a home.
What is more fun than spinning a clown around on a clothes line at 100 miles an hour?
Stopping it with a pitchfork.
I tried getting an abortion, but they said, "Sir, this is a pizzeria."
What does an orphan and a female's mouth have in common?
They take in 100's of kids.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apples get picked! 🤪
Did you hear they’re making an Elmo toy to appeal to the Tourette’s crowd?
I believe it’s called the “Tic Me Elmo.”
What is an emo's favorite place?
Niagara Falls.
What do you call a cat with a live in doctor?
An anemic, shrivelled cat with desperate attached owners.
I scanned an emo girl's arm the other day. Now I own her, only 3.99 with tax. That's a steal and a half, woopeeee!
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple...
An apple has a family tree.
A 17 year old pregnant Juanita flew all the way to NY from TX to get an abortion. Initially, she was denied the procedure because she wasn't COVID boosted, but after she explained the father was religious and wanted to be involved, they quickly resolved the threat.
What does Pikachu and an orphan have in common?
Pikachu, I choose you!
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang, because it comes back.
It's been an hour since I crashed the tower.
I saw an orphan take a selfie... oh man, that was one alone family photo.
Little Johnny walked into an ice cream shop and asked: "Do you have chocolate filled ice cream?"
The man replies: "We are out of that, sorry, we are almost out of every single flavor, do you want me to get you a vanilla filled one?"
Johnny replies: "Sure."
After that, the man asks for Johnny's phone and goes to back of the store. 5 minutes later, the man comes with an ice cream and Johnny's phone.
Johnny asks: "How much for the ice cream?"
The man replies: "Nothing, it's on the house."
After Johnny ate his delicious ice cream, he searched for his watch history. And then Johnny realized the flavor of the ice cream.
What do you call an emo kid playing with fire?
Forgot to clean little piece of dust.