ANS jokes

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?

Make them clap until their parents come back.

What falls first from a tree, an apple or an emo?

The apple... the emo just hangs there.

The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening.

"Sure honey! If you suck my dick!"

So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!"

"Oh yeah, I forgot," says the father. "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."

  • 1
  • Why does an orphan use water for his cereal?

    He is waiting for his dad with the milk.

    A penis has a sad life.

    His hair is a mess. His family is nuts. His neighbor is an asshole. His best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him. That's it for now.

    Orphans actually have an advantage. Nobody can call them motherless or test-tube babies in an argument.

    There are two muffins baking in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Phew, is it getting hot in here or is it just me?"

    The other muffin says, "AAAAHHH!! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

    READ THIS OUT LOUD:

    This is this cat.

    This is is cat.

    This is how cat.

    This is to cat.

    This is keep cat.

    This is an cat.

    This is idiot cat.

    This is a busy cat.

    This is for cat.

    This is forty cat this is seconds cat.

    NOW- go back and read the third word from each line from the start.

    What do you call someone with notorious special needs and an extra chromosome?

    The double trouble.

    When you tell an orphan, "I did your mom in your home," and they start crying.

    Me: You f&*k up.

    The class: Oh sh!&