So the horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" UwU
Why did the skunk 🦨 sleep 💤 under a car?
Because he wanted to wake up oily.
What’s the difference between a hoe and a roster? A roster says cockle doodle doo and a hoe says any cock will do
Why did the dog walk out at night .?to scare his people
why are bald eagles bald? because you're bald!!
they killed a whole family of crows.. it was a murder!... they killed a bunch of ravens..what a conspiracy!!
what do crows get after they buy a phone? a cawing card
why did the crows form a charity? because its all for good caws!
What did one ☝️ cat 🐈 say to the other? Happy 😃
What did one dog say to another dog? I love you
What do you call a cow with no toes
Lac-toes intolerant
What do you call a cow that doesn't stop shaking?
A milkshake
What animal do you always find at a baseball game? A bat
SHeep want to WOooll the world :)
A fish was swimming around in a pond when he noticed a fly flyin around about six inches above the water. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, I could have myself a nice meal.”
There was a bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, that fish will come up for that fly, and I can catch that fish and have myself a nice meal.”
There was a hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will go for the fish, and I can shoot the bear and have myself a nice meal.”
There was a mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich and I can have myself a nice meal.”
There was a cat in a tree watching the mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich, the mouse will go for the sandwich, and I can catch that mouse and have myself a nice meal.”
Then it all happened
The fly dropped six inches
The fish came up and caught the fly
The bear came out and caught the fish
The hunter got up to shoot the bear and dropped his sandwich
The mouse went for the sandwich
The cat jumped from the tree, missed, and landed in the pond
The lesson that can be learned here is that every time a fly drops six inches, a pussy gets wet.
Whaddaya got when ya got yourself a deer with no eyes?
Ya got no-eye-dear.
What do you call the bear that pushes all the other bears into the pool?
The dry bear.
What’s the difference between a bus full of children and a fish?
The fish can swim
What has four legs and one arm?
A rottweiler at a park.
What do you call a sad Doge? What? Nothing but Sarrrooooddd!