And jokes

Hi 👋 I love 💗 you walk in and out the door 🚪 night. I did not have time today. I was just a little bit and I had to walk home from home after dinner. I

When your mum tells you to help your granny.

And you unplug life support!

Run, or something will come to you, and you will be afraid to tell it to stop following you.

I tried my best to think of some puns, but I'm gonna have tibia honest: I don't have any puns left, but I'm pretty sternum, so I'll think of a few puns here and there. It took a lot of spine to do this.

I love you and I love you too. I love ❤️.

What’s the difference between a pile of babies and a Lamborghini?

I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

I have special needs, and I was born with it.

I am a George Formby fan, and I love football. My favourite manager was Arsène Wenger. My favourite referee was Collina. My favourite player was Dean Windas. So my favourite George Formby song was "Wenger, Collina, Windas."

What is the difference between babies and dogs?

I don't eat dog parts.

There was once a boy who took a selfie, and the next day became an orphan.

When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."

Knock knock. Who's there? Oswald. Oswald who? Oswald my Halloween candy and now it's stuck in my throat!

My friend told me she had a good joke and it beat all mine. I said, "Haha, that is funny!"

Colder than the conversation between a fat guy and a Super Model...

What goes in and comes out and makes you feel good but isn't sexual?

(Insulin)

What do you call a dog that is part pug, part poodle, and part cup?

A muggle! 🤠🤠🤠🤠🥴

What's the resemblance between a microwave and human reproduction?

They both make a sound at the end.

I heard my neighbors having sex, and it was annoying me, so I called my girlfriend to ask if she wanted to go out, but when I called her, I heard my neighbors' phone ringing.

"We make sexy time, yes, and every night I tap that."

"Talking about childhood habits, my friend told me he still collects coins and post stamps and all. He asked me, I said - breastfeeding."