And jokes

Why do orphans cry alone?

They do not have a mom's lap to sit on and a shoulder to cry on.

What's the difference between an orphan and a trash bag?

At least the trash bag gets picked.

Harry Kane and Hitler are similar; they both did nazi them losing.

My friend told me an EMO joke once, and I said, "EMO jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"

Your hairline was playing Sorry!

Pulled the wrong card and moved back five spaces.

What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?

The apple gets picked!

Knock, knock.

You suck my iron with you and mommy.

When you fall asleep on the couch and wake up in your bed.

But you know you live alone.

What can run, be an eyesore, and practice social distancing?

Your hairline.

You're so ugly, your class searched up Godfrey Baguma and all called out your name!

Helen Keller walked into a bar, a chair, and a table.

I’m going to reenact the ending of Saw (2004), except I won’t stand up and shut the door.

What do you call a hamburger that can talk and walk?

Funny weird walkie hamburger and talkie cute hamburger. Lol.

God: I feel like I'm forgetting something... oh no, Earth! *sees it on fire* Oh, it's fine.

People of Earth: *running and screaming*

Santen: *to God* Really?

Engineer: I know engineering, and my gut instinct tells me to fix it!

Biologist: I know biology, and your gut instinct is full of shit.

What’s the difference between 69 and High School?

In 69 you usually only kiss one c*nt and look at one a**hole.

I was digging and found some gold. I was going to tell my mom, then I remembered why I was digging.

Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street when all of a sudden, Paddy falls down a manhole. Murphy shouts down, "Paddy, is it dark down there?"

Paddy shouts up, "Dunno Murphy, I crnt see a fecking thing!"

Once my friend saw my wrist, slapped it and said "I like ya cuts, G!"

Little Mickel was on a tree.

He fell down and hurt his knee.

He sat down and started to cry, and from there, he would never lie.