And jokes

A blond-haired girl, a brown-haired girl, and a ginger-haired girl were out walking when they came across some tracks.

The brown-haired girl looked at them and said, "I think they are elephant tracks."

Then the ginger-haired girl looked at the tracks and said, "No way, they are definitely duck tracks."

Finally, the blond-haired girl bent down to examine the tracks when she got hit by the train.

What's black and white and hard as nails? A nun on speed!

A pun enters the room and kills ten people.

Pun in, ten dead.

I fear my last words will be "hold my beer and watch this."

I went to an orphanage and had a yo mama smack down. That's it.

What does a priest and a clown have in common?

They both make children cry.

So, Helen Keller walks into a bar... And then a table.

I was hunting at night for deer, and then I found one and shot it. I realized the deer I shot was actually my ex...

I got a roommate. He killed a butterfly, and I said no butter for a week. The next day, he killed a cockroach. Son of a bitch, nice try.

What is the difference between a comedian and a clown?

A comedian leads Ukraine, and a clown leads America.

What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can’t be found.

What do you get when you put 2 nuns and a blond on a football field? 2 tight ends and a wide receiver.

What's the difference between a hoe and a sidechick? The hoe want different meals, the sidechick always gone be that one crumb on the side of the plate for debate 💯.

Ice cream truck drivers are the most sus people on earth. They’re adults who play children’s music and give ice cream to kids who approach their van.

I was crying at school and telling my friends that my grandpa died. Then I told them I still remember his last words. They wanted to hear them. They are: "you still holding the ladder?"

What's the difference between orphans and apples?

Apples get picked.

Yo mama so fat, I took a picture of her and she was on both sides of it.

I went to the dam to take the dam tour, but the dam tour guide told me there wasn't going to be a dam tour that day. So I was thirsty and I wanted some dam water, but the dam man wouldn't give me any dam water, so I told the dam man to keep his dam water.

It's only okay to beat up a dwarf when they walk up to your wife and say, "Your hair smells nice."

You remind me of a snowflake, beautiful and unique. One touch and you're wet.