And jokes

God creates a wasp :)

God: Okay, so make it reeeeally tiny. Like less than half a fly.

Angel: okay... a bug.

God: now give it's face a sword, but it has a hole so it's basically a mouth.

Angel: weird.. but okay...

God: and give it wings.

Angel: eh, not half bad Go-

God: NOW MAKE IT EAT THE BLOOD OF ALL LIVING ANIMALS AND HUMANS

Angel: *shook* o-okay

God: okay. Now make sure whenever a human is bit it feels the pain of a million suns burning it, making it scratch until it bleeds out.

Angel: . - .

God: and make sure it also transfers diseases through the species. Give 'em a taste 'o that! *evil grin*

Angel: *cries*

Angel: *whispers; I'm so sorry..*

A man (Ameenya Sheed) texts another man (Bob) and said,

"Hi, I'm Ameenya Sheed."

Bob: "You're not in my shed because I don't have one, but I have a garage. I don't think you're in there."

What do you call an elephant and a rhino mix?

Helliphino!

What's the difference between a Ferrari and 100 dead babies?

I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

So this guy we talked to wanted me to leave forever, and we said, "What? You never want to hear from me again?"

Every like this gets, I will kill a telemarketer.

Every dislike, I will kill a cute puppy.

Every comment, I will kill your ex bf or gf and send you a PS5.

Moan moan moan moan and I moan more moan again moan moan and again and ×1000000.

Why is your forehead so shiny? Did somebody laminate you? You're so shiny, Mulan can look into your forehead and sing "Reflection."

A nut told me to eat him, so I did, but something weird happened. I turned into a nut, and when I poop, there were eggs there.

What does NASA stand for?

Nose and smelly astronauts.

Hey guys, it's Gwen, and I want to say that I'm deleting my account regarding a comment made on my last post :(

Q: What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

A: One of them gets picked.

Fatty and Skinny were in a bed.

Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was pegged.

Best way to kiss someone is to lick inside their mouth with your tongue a lot of times, and they will really like it, especially me!! - lizard kiss+ french kiss= SloBbY Kiss.

Thanks for learning and getting advice.

Also, don't be such a horny one!

Little Jonny, what you like airplane? How? Because you fly fast and jump high.

Why don't orphans like Russia and Germany?

Because it's the Mother and Father Land.

just yeah bruh and yeah.

If the genie from Aladdin was here, my three wishes would be for you to die, your kids to have a miserable life, and for everyone you love to die.

What do you get when you cross a cow and the Kool-Aid Man? Donald Trump, cuz of his red face and juicy tits.

We were so poor my dad would give me a penny not to eat supper.

I'd put it under my pillow and while I was sleeping, he would come in and take it. In the morning, he would holler at me for losing the penny.