And jokes

Jesus has a twisted humor.

kittens cute cuddly and loveable oh yeah, I almost forgot, add razors that stick out [of] their feet.

Ever looked at a cemetery and thought, wow, Heaven and Hell must be crowded?

I’m a god, and I’m here to flex on you bitches. My flight to New York on September 11th was rocky, but I lived.

Imagine dying on a plane, fr. At least try and respawn:/

What’s the difference between Jesus and a plank of wood?

A plank of wood can take nails to the extremities without screaming.

What's the difference between an American police man and a Christian?

At least a Christian kneels in church.

Orphan joke protest! If you think orphan jokes are bad and wrong, then comment good comments; if not, then just comment! Let's reach 67,000 good comments!

So little Johnny was walking to the bathroom, and he said, "Grandma," said, "why is the blood coming out of your ###😥 I need to call help."

What’s yellow and can’t swim? A school bus.

I call my sister a "fat cow," and she asks me, "Want to hear a joke?" I say, "Sure." She says, "You are the joke!"

A girl invites her friends to come to her birthday party, and at the party, one of her friends poops their pants.

When Sally finds out, she yells, “I never should have invited you to my party! You are a party pooper!”

The person to make the first cannabinol cookbook had a wife and ate (eight) children.

What's the difference between a fish and a guitar?

You can tuna guitar, but you can't tuna fish!

I was going to write a joke about my penis, but it was too lång and overused.

I like my women like I like my wine.

Twelve years old and tied up in my basement.

What's the difference between MetaCareForAll and the resurrection of our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

One of them is an unrealistic fantasy that can never come true because it wouldn't work. The other one is the resurrection our lord and savior Jesus Christ.

How did Steven Hawking die?

His wife needed a charger and plugged him out.

What’s the difference between an Englishman and a unicorn?

Nothing.

What is the difference between a human and a house? A human can walk, and a house cannot walk.

What is the difference between a human and a tree? A human can walk, and a tree 🌳 cannot walk.

Mrs. Mallara's boobs were (69) pounds. She said that was too too too much (69222), so she went to 51st Street (6922251) to visit Doctor X (6922251 x), and the surgery lasted 8 hours (6922251 x 8).

She ended up (the total flipped upside down spells boobless) (=)55378008