Air jokes
9/11 jokes aren’t funny. They always crash and burn.
What’s the best air to breathe if you want to be rich? Millionaire.
People in Africa have earth, fire, air, but never water.
So a woman walks into a magician's toy store and browses the collection. Among which was a black, phallic-looking object. She brings it to the counter and asks, "what's this?"
The cashier explains that it's a magical dildo that will listen to whatever you say, "fuck me in the ass," it'll float in the air and fuck you in the ass, "fuck me in the pussy," it'll float in the air and fuck you in the pussy, "faster," it'll go faster, "harder," it'll go harder. She bought this magical artifact and went home for a night of fun and pleasure.
After receiving several orgasms from the magical dildo, she'd had enough, and she told it to stop, but it didn't. The dildo continued to penetrate her, it would go harder and faster, but it refused to stop or slow down. In a panic, she ran over to her car and drove to the hospital to get it surgically removed. Her panic made her disregard the traffic rules, and she quickly found herself pulled over by a cop. As she pulled down her window, the cop leaned towards the door and asked "Do you have any idea how fast you were going!?", the woman tried to explain the situation, she told the officer about the magical dildo stuck in her pussy, but the officer didn't believe her, "magical dildo, my ass" he said, and the lady drove home.
My Grandpa killed 30 Air Force pilots in WW2. He was a very bad mechanic.
An African man visits his friend in the US.
“I just flew in yesterday,” the African man says. “And boy are my arms tired!”
“You know, that’s kind of an old joke here in America,” replied his friend.
“Joke?” the African man said. “I’ve been holding my hands in the air yelling ‘don’t shoot’ ever since I got to this damn country!”
Kobe likes his shoes like the way he died.
Air.
What does the EPA issue when a person stinks up a room with their smelly farts?
Air quality alert code brown!
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe. He holds air hostage.
Have you heard about the smart traveler? He's clearly going places.
My friend said, "Why do you have depression? There is so much happiness in the world." And I said, "Why do you have asthma? There is so much air in the world."
If Donald Trump gets any worse, they'll have to replace Air Force One with a short bus.
Why do orphans air?
It’s invisible just like their parents.
I got stuck in the dryer again. Brother, say less.
You guys are idiots!
Johnny is on his way to school when he comes across a frog. With a sudden inspirational thought, he picks the frog up, shoves a firecracker up the frog's arse, lights the cracker, and blows the frog to smithereens.
Now at school, the teacher asks the class: "Has anybody got anything for show and tell this morning?"
Johnny waves his arm in the air and is virtually screaming "Me mis me mis me mis".
"Ok Johnny, what do you have to share with the class today?"
Little Johnny then says, "Well on my way to school today I shoved a cracker up a frog's arse." The teacher interrupts and says, "It's not arse Johnny, It's rectum."
Johnny then says, "Fucking oath it wrecked 'im."
Penis.
Why were the tenants of the Twin Towers sad?
They ordered a pepperoni pizza, but they got PLANE.
Who are the fastest readers in the world? The 9/11 terrorists went through like 78 stories in 7 seconds.
What keeps you breathing when you're on Earth?
I don't know. I suffocated at birth.