Advantage

Advantage jokes

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    • I got mad at my white friend today. I, as a darker person, had told them to meet me outside at 3 o'clock. They, being VERY special that day, had said, "AM or PM?"

    Laughing at their question, I said, "Honey, 3 AM, because I'll lose a fight at 3 PM."

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    • Breakup

    • My cousin just broke up with his girlfriend, and I told him, "Since your dad owns a moving company, you can already take half of her stuff."

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    • Bible

    • The pastor of the local church calls on the congregation for volunteers for Bible sales.

    A gentleman with a severe stutter approaches the pastor after Sunday service.

    "I-i-i... I-i-id like to v-v-v-v-vol-vol-vo-volunteer to s-s-s-se-sell b-b-b-bi-b-bibles, f-fff-f-f-fa-fa-father..."

    "That would be wonderful, my son. We'll start you with one box. Please go door to door throughout the community and sell what you can. You can give these away, but donations are always accepted since the word of God is the most important message."

    "T-t-t-t-th-th-th-thank you f-ff-f-f-f-fa-fa-fath-father... i-i-i-i-i-i-I'll s-s-s-s-se-se-sell what I c-c-c-cc-can..."

    The pastor sends the man on his way.

    About an hour later to the pastor's surprise, the stuttering man returns with an empty box and $200 cash.

    The pastor is completely shocked, but is ultimately filled with joy as the church could use the funds more than ever, not to mention the community is that much closer to God's message.

    So without asking questions, he happily sends the stuttering man on his way with 2 more boxes of Bibles.

    "T-t-t-t-t-t-th-th-th-th-tha-thank you f-ff-f-f-f-fa-fa-fath-father, i-i-i-i-i-i-I'll be back s-s-s-s-s-soo-soo-soo-soon."

    Exactly 2 hours later the stuttering man returns, only this time carrying 2 empty boxes and $500 cash.

    The pastor is at a loss for words. So much so, that he's questioning whether the stuttering man is coming across these funds legitimately.

    He pulls the man aside and asks, "Son, while myself and the church thank you for your efforts in selling these bibles, we want to make sure not to take advantage of common people. Most of my volunteers take upwards of a month to sell a single box of Bibles, and you've sold 3 boxes in a few hours. May I ask what you're telling these people when you approach their home?"

    "W-w-w-w-we-we-well f-ff-f-f-f-fa-fa-fath-father it-it-it-it-its qui-q-q-q-qui-quite s-s-s-s-s-s-si-sim-simple."

    "I ju-ju-ju-ju-just ask the-the-th-th-th-the-them if th-th-th-th-the-the-they'd l-l-l-l-li-li-li-li-lik-like to b-b-b-b-b-b-b-bu-bu-buy a b-b-b-bi-bi-bi-bible or if they w-w-w-w-w-wa-wa-wa-wan-want me to re-re-re-rea-read it to them."

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    • Date

    • Question: What is the BIG ADVANTAGE to going out on a date with a "Homeless Chic"?

    Answer: After the date, you can "Drop Her Off" ANYWHERE!

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    • Orphan

    • Orphans actually have an advantage. Nobody can call them motherless or test-tube babies in an argument.

    Student

    • The good thing about being gay in school is that you can be the best student and still get all the D's.

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    • Orphan

    • Like this if you laughed.

    These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.

    I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.

    Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.

    Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.

    Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back. (Clearly someone didn't come back with the milk)

    Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.

    What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.

    Hope you had fun reading this! My friend and I laughed reading all of em!

    Man

    • What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?

    Suck a big cock.

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