Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

So a lady was walking down the street with two bags, and one of the bags was leaking $100 bills. A cop pulls up and he says, “Ma’am, ma’am, your bag is leaking hundred dollar bills.” Then she says, “Oh, thank you. I wonder how long that’s been going on.” And the cop says, “Before I help you, may I ask why your bag is leaking $100 bills?” And the lady says, “OK, I’ll tell you. So I live next to a stadium, and I have this beautiful rose garden, but these dumb teenagers always try and pee on the rosebushes. So they stick their junk through the fence, and I grab their junk. I said, ‘$100 dollars or it’s coming off.’” The cop says, “Oh, OK, well what’s the other bag for?” And she says, “Well, not all of them want to give me $100.”

How many hookers fit in a Cadillac?

About 4 in the trunk if you stack 'em right.

How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb?

Definitely not 13, because my basement is still dark.

The woman had a dick, lol, it's your mom ahahahahahaha, yeah YOU! Jhon man! In New York City I am on to you! I will be under your bed tonight lol get a bodyguard!

What's the difference between the Queen's death and Princess Diana's death? The Queen died in peace, not pieces.

What do you call it when you have two Indians, one Black, and a fat White?

A s'more.

One, I grow some som more, yea, I am 4. I'm Caillou, I'm Caillou, I'm Caillou, that's me.

We don't joke about orphans unless they have family. Then we assassinate the family.