9 jokes

When was the only time you could see people base jump without a parachute?

2001/9/11.

Stop making 9/11 jokes, my father died in a plane crash.

Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.

I don't like 9/11 jokes; they have a tendency to crash and burn.

  • 4

    • A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."

    "What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married 10 times?"

    "Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative. He kept telling me how great it was going to be. Husband #2 was in software services. He was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me. Husband #3 was from field services. He said everything checked out diagnostically, but he just couldn't get the system up. Husband #4 was in telemarketing. Even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver. Husband #5 was an engineer. He understood the basic process, but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method. Husband #6 was from finance and administration. He thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not. Husband #7 was in marketing. Although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it. Husband #8 was a psychologist. All he ever did was talk about it. Husband #9 was a gynecologist. All he did was look at it. Husband #10 was a stamp collector. All he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"

    "Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"

    "You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm going to get screwed!"

  • 4

    • A child was walking through the forest when a wolf jumped in front of him. The child saw that the wolf had no leg. He then became a terrorist and caused 9/11.

    8008135 is my favorite number.

    The worst ratio is 6:9.

    And last but not least, "Why was six afraid of seven?" Seven eight nine. But why was six with nine? Because when you put them together, you get 69. But why was six mad at nine? Because Nine eight six, too.

    Q: You want to know why I don’t make jokes about 9/11?

    A: They tend to crash and burn.

  • 5

    • Person 1: Did you hear the joke bout 9/11?

    Person 2: No, but it'll probably crash and burn.

    Q: How do you make a 9/11 cocktail?

    A: Light two Manhattans on fire and then knock them over.

  • 0

    • How did people know the 9/11 victims had a lot of dandruff?

    Their head and shoulders were all over New York City!

  • 0

    • What is the difference between McDonald's and 9/11?

    McDonald's has a drive-through. Twin Towers has a fly-through.

  • 7

    • Who are the fastest readers in the world?

    9/11 victims, they went through 87 stories in 7 seconds.

    Knock knock.

    Who's there?

    9/11.

    9/11 who?

    You said that you would never forget!

  • 0